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View Poll Results: How should we tell the Newbie? (please read post before answering)
The Secondary should tell the Newbie right away. 9 81.82%
The Secondary should tell the Newbie after their relationship progresses. 0 0%
You should tell the Newbie ASAP. 0 0%
You should tell the Newbie after her relationship with the Secondary progresses. 0 0%
Everyone should talk about this together ASAP. 2 18.18%
Everyone should talk about this after the relationship between the Newbie and Secondary progresses. 0 0%
You and the Primary should break up with the Secondary. 0 0%
Voters: 11. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 12-11-2013, 01:37 PM
kdt26417's Avatar
kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Yelm, Washington
Posts: 14,566

It's possible you may need/want to talk to Newbie personally at some point. I'd consider telling Secondary this and asking him to let you know if/when he's filled Newbie in on the nature of your major relationships. Then if/when you get word of that from him, ask him to give Newbie your contact info and to let her know you'd like to meet/greet her, as close to in-person as you can get.

Not sure of all the details of that advice yet, but the point is, talking to Newbie directly would be a way of "knowing" (as much as one can know) whether Secondary has told Newbie what you really needed him to tell her in order for you to stay in a romantic relationship with him.

Not even 100% sure you'd want/need to talk to Newbie yourself, but it's something to consider.

Hope all works out alright.
Kevin T.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
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