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Old 12-06-2013, 05:40 AM
AnnabelMore's Avatar
AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,285

"she should" <-- This is the crux of my problem with your advice. She "should" do what's best for her. She's decided that that doesn't include having a sexual relationship with someone who has a history of lying about his safer sex practices (did you miss that part above? kind of a big deal), and who are you to say differently with such authority? You don't know anything about how good or bad his judgment is when it comes to how trustworthy other people are -- some people are wonderful folks but terrible judges of character -- and yet you presume to know that she "should" be breaking her own limits when it comes to sexual safety.

Many, many people feel that being told they "should" accept a level of risk that they're not comfortable with in order to save a particular relationship prevents them enjoying that relationship, or feeling safe and happy and strong in general. I know I feel that way.

And with that, I think I've said everything I have to say that has a chance of usefully contributing to this thread, and am gonna step back.
Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.
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