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  #11  
Old 11-28-2013, 11:39 PM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Yelm, Washington
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Re:
Quote:
"We've talked about therapy but he doesn't seem terribly interested ... Doesn't want me to leave though."
Ahem -- emm, yeah, that sounds to me like, "I want you to stay with me while I ... continue to put zero effort into improving."

Quote:
"Find out just what any people will submit to, and you have found out the exact amount of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them; and these will continue till they are resisted with either words or blows, or with both. The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress."
-- Frederick Douglass, http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Frederi...ion_.281857.29
Sorry we all seem to be dogpiling your fiancÚ with disrespect, and maybe he can change and improve, if he has sufficient motivation. Right now he still seems to be more worried about how other women feel than about how you feel. Just call him on that shit and make it known in no uncertain terms that you deserve better ... because you do.

Regards,
Kevin T.
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  #12  
Old 08-27-2016, 12:12 PM
MrFarFromRight MrFarFromRight is offline
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Location: Ping-ponging around Europe, trying to get a publishing concern off the ground
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Hi, MissSadieD!

I see that you haven't made a comment on this forum since April, and that you haven't added to your own threads since 2013. But - I have my spies - I notice that you have looked in more recently.

I'm reviving this thread so that:

a) you might come back and give us an update. How are things going for you now? Much better, I hope.

b) others (esp. newbies) can read this example of the difference between poly and using "poly" as a cover for cheating.

I haven't read all through your 2 threads, but enough to beg you not to marry that man. (Or have you already?) A man who - after committing himself to be open - not only cheats but gets his friends to back him up in his lies. This is ORGANISED cheating.

A man who says that he "doesn't want our relationship to end (especially since we have children together)" [the underlining is mine] (read: the children are more important to him than you are), but who dumps you for another woman while you're pregnant (with - I almost assume - his child).

You know the saying: "When the going gets tough, the tough get going!"? My advice: Just let him go... as far away as possible.

This is not a man who's going to be a lot of help in raising children. Whether you're mono or poly, you can cut this tough guy loose and find someone who's more supportive AND more honest.

I think that it would be a great service to this forum to revive at least one of your threads and let us all know how you're doing now. Your story can help others.

Maybe the moderators could merge the 2 and file the resultant thread in "Relationships".

MissSadieD, even if you're mono, you will always be welcome here!

Hugs,
MFFR
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cheating, jealousy, open relationship

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