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Old 03-26-2010, 04:22 PM
holm holm is offline
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 7

Thanks once again for the replies, specifically the recommendations on what I can actually do to make this better.

Honestly, you're reassuring me that the things I am doing are right. We had another couple who has a baby over last week for a visit (my wife had got together with her but we had never done anything as couples before). We decided to do a getaway spa weekend with just the two of us in April (I'll love the alone time and she'll love the spa!). Also, we're planning on going to dinner with another couple on Sunday night and also talking about going on a real vacation (tropical, we're in WI and winter kills me) and trying to get her sister and BF to come along. We're kind of "auditioning" new couples friends I guess. Also, I tried to plan a surprise trip for my wife's best friend from highschool and her husband to visit next week when they have spring break (teachers) but that fell through do to an unexpected death in their family. Basically, yes I am trying to step out of my shell and support my wife's needs for other relationships (just not the romantic kind!), recreation, and conversation. Honeslty, conversation is the hardest one right now because I am just so BAD at it.

The other thing that I didn't mention is that I was put in a sales position at my current job 9 months ago as part of my "development". As an introvert it took all my energy to do the job so I no energy to be extro at home after talking to people 8 hours a day, everyday. Talked to my boss about what's been going on at home (without the details) and I'm going to be going back into a operations role in April. Same pay and benefits, so it won't create any financial strain. Just knowing that has allowed me to be more available emotionally to my wife. It's great to have a good boss!

I have an appointment with my counselor today and I basically want to tell her that I do feel better, but everyday is still a challange. I obviously had a relapse here the past couple days, but it was certainly not as severe or as long as the intitial waves of panic. I think this is a good sign.

One day at a time...it's not going to fix itself in one day, or one week, or probably even a month or year, but if we can make it better everyday this could be great.
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