approaching friends for MORE...
I saw GS post on this in another thread and thought-been there done that!
K and I were friends. Her gf dumped her for a man. She was devastated. I held her in my arms, her tears streaming down my neck and chest.
A few months went by-and she wrote me a letter. Terrified of my reaction she handed it to me in her truck, parked in the dark by the ocean front in the fog.
I opened the letter and when I started reading-she panicked. She got out of the truck, shut the door oh so gently and wandered away. I stopped reading briefly wondering what the heck that was all about-but figured I should finish the letter then follow her.
So I read it. Tears came to my eyes. Her letter was telling me her feelings, her true, real feelings. It wasn't just an "I love you. Will you date me?" letter. She wrote that she thought she was falling for me, part of her wanted to tell me, but another part was terrified of what I might think-she knew I was bi, not straight or gay and that I tended to date men, and just take on women as a side thing. She was afraid of losing my friendship, afraid of being turned down, thought ill of, or humiliated.
I went looking for her, found her curled up defensively on a bench near the water. I leaned down and took her hand, brought her back to the truck and kissed her passionately.
Girl still owns a piece of my heart. She's long gone, moved on. But she's the perfect woman in my heart, my mind, my soul.
GG and I were friends for a couple years. In a moment of heartbreak, confusion and frustration I snuck into his house (he wasn't home). I crawled through a window-then unlocked the front door, went back out to get my then 3 1/2 year old daughter.
We went to GG's room, I laid out blankets in a corner for her, tucked her in and sang her to sleep.
I curled up in his bed and dozed on and off waiting for him to come home.
He came home with friends in tow and found his bedroom door locked. He was baffled, I could hear him exclaiming that he KNEW he'd never locked that door before he left. I unlocked it just as he was trying to pick it. He told the friends he had to deal with "this" (whatever that was, he nor they knew) and came in the room, shut the door.
I can't recall the exact conversation. In fact I daresay he recalls more of the details then I. But we made love that night-his first time. We curled up together in one anothers arms and slept, peacefully for me.
The next day I went home.
Years of deep platonic friendship followed and then when my world crumbled after I put that same daughter on a plane, he struggled through months of watching me suffer alone.
I broke finally and went to him again. I told him I was in love with him, that I loved Maca, but Maca was so caught up in his own drama he hadn't the time of day for me and I just needed someone to love me, for me, right now.
We became lovers and our bond tightened quickly-though I don't know how that was possible, we were already so close.
"Love As Thou Wilt"
|friends, lovers, risks|