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  #11  
Old 07-02-2009, 04:36 PM
Mark1npt Mark1npt is offline
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The only way my own little poly world ever could have worked was if my wife and the other woman involved, did know eachother and could hit it off and live together under one roof. That was exactly our case with perhaps her closest friend. A total outsider, a bimbo, would have never given me a snowball's chance for this relationship to succeed. I firmly think there must be a meet and everyone must mesh and get along for any hope of this to work over the long haul. Now if anyone just wants a poly partner for 6 weeks or months, well then anything goes and no one needs to give a rats ass about the other.

Last edited by Mark1npt; 07-03-2009 at 12:22 AM.
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  #12  
Old 07-02-2009, 06:32 PM
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redsirenn redsirenn is offline
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I have to be honest here, this situation is bothersome to me. From what I gather from foxflame's other posts, both her relationship with her husband and this new relationship with this married man are in a state of great change. Entering into new relationships while other people feel apprehensive doesn't seem to fit with the "consent of all involved" philosophy, or the "move at the pace of the slowest partner" philosophy. In short, this feels rushed to me, and seems doomed to failure. I feel for foxflame's husband and this man's wife. Not that I know them personally, but the way the relationship progressed so quickly is something that makes us new to poly relationships afraid of the lifestyle and the choices our SOs could UNILATERALLY make.
That is my 2 cents. Bash it if you like.
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  #13  
Old 07-02-2009, 06:58 PM
Mark1npt Mark1npt is offline
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No bashing here RS...you make a valid point.

Last edited by Mark1npt; 07-03-2009 at 12:22 AM.
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  #14  
Old 07-02-2009, 07:01 PM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark1npt View Post
The only way my own little poly world ever could have worked was if my wife and the other woman involved, did know eachother and could hit it off and live together under one roof. That was exactly our case with perhaps her closest friend. A total outsider, a bimbo, would have never given me a snowball's chance for this relationship to succeed. I frimly think there must be a meet and everyone must mesh and get along for any hope of this to work over the long haul. Now if anyone just wants a poly partner for 6 weeks or months, well then anything goes and no one needs to give a rats ass about the other.
I'm quoting the whole thing because it is a great statement, Mark. You are definitely an example setting person in my books Of course I'm totally not into short term relationships as to me they are more "open relationship" flings..just a way to have more and different sex. Nothing wrong with that, just not my thing.

Last edited by MonoVCPHG; 07-02-2009 at 07:03 PM.
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  #15  
Old 07-03-2009, 12:28 AM
Mark1npt Mark1npt is offline
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Mono, I suspect that more and different sex is at the very root of most poly people. I must admit it, it may have been part of my initial attraction to the poly life as it is a very nice fringe benefit. The fact of the matter is, it can't be the main reason or your depth in your relationship becomes self limiting. Most long term loving relationships need to function as limitless entities to last. IMO
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  #16  
Old 07-03-2009, 12:45 AM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Yeah Mark, I agree with you..I obviously have some serious issues around that whole topic of people just being able to enjoy sex as an activity or with a "moderate" love..I never thought I would when I was married which is funny..it's not judgement based but jealousy based. I have learned what sex means to me and how it relates to displaying love..it is a huge thing to me, one that I could start a new thread on and perhaps I will.

The sex issue is the key thing in my balance of pleasure and pain, which determines my future. That is why I have found a new approach to my relationship, one that makes me extremely happy in the moment and that is exactly where I am staying LOL!..my secret though

On that note I'll stop straying from the topic
Take care

Last edited by MonoVCPHG; 07-03-2009 at 12:47 AM.
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