Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions

Notices

View Poll Results: Do you actually have open relationships without any kind of limits?~
Yes, no limits at all.~ 7 16.28%
I have open relationships, but there are some limits.~ 26 60.47%
No, I have closed relationships.~ 4 9.30%
I'm not sure.~ 3 6.98%
Other.~ 3 6.98%
Voters: 43. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
  #38  
Old 10-26-2013, 02:18 AM
ColorsWolf's Avatar
ColorsWolf ColorsWolf is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: CA, U.S.A.
Posts: 360
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by kdt26417 View Post
Mmmm, don't think she was being judgmental or hostile. Just stating her own opinion, which, yes, differed from the perception you expressed, but that doesn't necessarily mean she was trying to harass you (or anyone else) personally.

To me, she has a point. Circumstances are one thing; limits are another. Heck, even breathing: the circumstance is that we need air to survive. The limit is that we choose to breathe so that we can cope with that circumstance. So yeah, she has fair reason to draw a distinction from how I see it.

As for her calendar remark, lots of people have stated why they personally feel they need calendars and, as in InfinitePossibility's post, that doesn't necessarily mean they're trying to condemn people who don't use calendars. Just pointing out that people tend to have less compatibility if they're functioning by different sets of standards. In order to choose one kind of freedom, you often have to relinquish a freedom you may have wanted to freely associate with some particular other person.

I don't think anyone's trying to force anyone to do anything here, but I do see where some misunderstandings may have cropped up here and there. Yes, we should definitely be able to freely share our experiences, lives, and perspectives without being judged. That means that if one person's experience, life, and perspective differs from another person's, that one person should be able to feel like it's okay to express the difference without worrying that the other person might get bent out of shape over that difference.

A differing opinion doesn't necessarily constitute an attempt to start an argument. One person sees things one way, another person sees things another way. Seems to me that we should be able to interact in a spirit of peace despite that prickly reality.

I know it hurts me when someone thinks I'm somehow attacking them, and yet that's not at all what I'm trying to do. People deserve credit for expressing themselves civilly, regardless of whether our perspectives can all be harmoniously aligned.

And yeah, sometimes someone will inadvertently say something offensive or inappropriate. Which I hope we will all try to be patient and forgiving about. But I don't personally feel that SNeacail is guilty of that error in this case.

Sorry, but I guess I'm feeling a leedle more sensitive than usual today. I'd like to see us all get along a little better. That would be nice.

Respectfully,
Kevin T.

Quote:
Originally Posted by SNeacail View Post
OMG! It's like arguing with my husband when he creates his own definitions to common terms and goes on to berate anyone who doesn't understand this "new" definition.
What part of this is not trying to create an argument?~

No one is being berated here here, it seems like she is seeing an argument where there is none.~

I was not referring to her "calender" remark, why do people seem to think that "I" have a problem with some one else's way of living?~

I already stated that I do not.~

If people are going to pop up saying that I am berating, "have a problem with", and am arguing with every one, then they obviously have not read my posts and I'm starting to wonder if I should even bother responding to these kinds of accusations.~ *sighs, shakes head*
__________________
Love yourself, you are beautiful!~ ^_^

*Believe in yourself, you can do anything*!~ ^_^

Appreciate every thing, every thing is precious.~


Last edited by ColorsWolf; 10-26-2013 at 03:00 AM.
Reply With Quote
 

Tags
infinite, limitless, limits, open, relationships

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 08:59 AM.