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Old 03-05-2010, 12:23 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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My kids actually are the reason I have an issue with Primary/Secondary or any other Heirarchy layout.

See-I am training them.
One of the concepts I'm trying to teach them is that Loving isn't the same as favoritism or even related.
Just because something is your favorite thing, doesn't mean you LOVE it and just because you LOVE someone doesn't mean they are the FAVORITE.

I prefer to think of it as I have a "favorite" box and all those I LOVE are in it together....

I explained to Maca today that "marriage" to me isn't what the world defines it. The world considers marriage a contract between two people. I consider marriage to be a COMMITMENT between two people. ANY two people. I consider it a commitment between myself and my child to do my best for them and love them unconditionally. I consider it a commitment between myself and my parents to love each other unconditionally. I consider it a commitment between myself and my friends to be there for one another and love each other unconditionally. I consider it to be a commitment between myself and my lovers to be there for one another and to Love each other unconditionally.

I consider it MY commitment to be unconditional and stand by my commitments to others REGARDLESS of them choosing to do so.

BUT-if I want to teach my children not to play "favorites" in the way they treat those they love, then I need to SHOW them that behavior, not tell them about it.

Therefore it's very important to me that I not use primary/secondary status with Maca and GG. Because the truth is that I love both of them with no conditions and I don't believe that Love ends and I don't believe that one or the other will stop being important if they leave, I will still love them....
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boyfriends, definitions, defintions, descriptions, equality, equanimity, family, girlfriends, hierarchy, importance, labeling, new dynamics, new relationships, poly singles, prescriptions, primaries, primary, primary/secondary, relationship dynamics, relationships, secondaries, secondary, terminology, unicorn

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