Originally Posted by redsirenn
...I have a feeling you all can define abuse clearer. ESPECIALLY for yourselves. If you are a survivor of abuse - you might be able to contribute to this thread.
Think about it.
I think that you have a really clear definition of abuse, but this is not the case for everyone.
I know that I was beaten as a kid. We used to hide the belt or whatever was being used to hit us that week in the hopes that we wouldn't be punished. This was not outside the guidelines of what was considered good parenting in those days (not so long ago) but I would be horrified if someone took a belt to my kids. It *is* considered abuse now.
I know that when I was a teenager, I was pressured into a lot of things I wouldn't allow now. I know that often I said no but they didn't stop. This is considered date rape now.
I am finding in my adult life that *shocking* numbers of people I know were abused in a way that is clearly abuse no matter who you ask. I think it's more accurate to say that many, many people were abused, rather than narrowing the field to non-monogamous people.