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Old 09-18-2013, 11:50 AM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 6,282

Originally Posted by Bluebird View Post
Does anyone use diaphragms?
I used one for 20 years (age 22-42) on and off. I was married and mono. Took time off using it to get and be pregnant 3 times. I know they are very out of fashion now. It worked well for me and my (ex) husband in that time. We did not have super frequent sex though. Once or twice a week at most.

At age 42 I started on the Pill because our sex life heated up when peri-menopause kicked in for me,. increasing my libido. (I was on the Pill from age 16-22 also.) My ex was never comfortable with condoms and refused to get a vasectomy (grrr...). We wanted to have sex at least once a day and I didn't feel like wearing a diaphragm half the day!

Well, I did not know that I had a blood mutation called Factor V Leiden, which make me 7 times more likely to get blood clots than the average person. No doc ever mentioned to me that some people have this and other blood clotting mutations and should never take synthetic estrogen. (I recommend anyone considering going on hormone based BC get tested for blood clotting mutations. No doctor does it as a matter of course.)

Since being on the Pill also makes any woman 7 times more likely to clot than those not on it (or Depo and any other estrogen based BC), I was a ticking time bomb, 49 times more likely to clot than the average person!

And I did come down with blood clots in one leg and both lungs, needing hospitalization and months on anti-coagulants. The anti-coag (warfarin) made my periods super heavy and I became severely anemic.

I found out this blood mutation was genetic and made sure both my adolescent daughters were tested. One has it, one doesn't. The one that has it should never be on any synthetic estrogen. The progestin only pill is right for her, or condoms. Or a diaphragm, if she is mono and fluid bonded.

So, after the blood clots, I went back on the diaphragm until menopause kicked in, which was very welcome indeed! Of course since then, my h and I broke up and I started dating men who were fine using condoms. By then I was no longer fertile but needed to protect against disease. But by August of 2012 I became fluid bonded with my bf (I already was with my gf) and haven't had intercourse with anyone else for longer than that.

I know some women lose libido in peri-menopause and after. Lucky for me I've had the opposite experience and can just enjoy barrier and hormone free sex!
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

Mags (poly, F, 62) loving Pixie (poly, F, 40) since January 2009, living together since 2013
Seeing Kahlo (polyish, M, 45)
Master, (mono, M, 36), Pixie's Dom/bf for 3+ years
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