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  #11  
Old 09-08-2013, 07:00 PM
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alibabe_muse alibabe_muse is offline
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I use condoms with new partners and will continue to do so. Even if they are sti free, there's nothing stopping them from having unprotected sex with a new partner who may not be sti free. When the relationship becomes more and I want to stop using condoms I'll ask for them to be tested and will request to see the results. I currently am tested every 6 months but am thinking I might go every 3.

In my youth I never used protection from sti's and am very very grateful that I was lucky (I slept with quite a lot of boys). After marrying dh 18 years ago I only had tests done when getting pregnant. A year ago we opened our marriage and I've used condoms but dh had not with his gf from last winter. Neither of them would go get tested so I did.

I'd rather be safe than sorry years later from not being proactive for my own health.
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  #12  
Old 09-09-2013, 04:06 AM
InsaneMystic InsaneMystic is offline
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I have the rare luxury of it being completely irrelevant to my life, seeing as fluid bonding is forever off the table with me to start with.

And I say "luxury" for one reason only: no need to meddle in what I see as a partner's private life. Their sex life, their STD risk, their business - not mine. It allows me to set a clearer boundary than would be possible if there were a chance of getting infected myself... I know I'd struggle with the feeling of being meddling/nosy if I had to weigh up their privacy versus my bodily health; this way, I can leave their privacy completely untouched.

Last edited by InsaneMystic; 09-09-2013 at 04:10 AM. Reason: typo
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  #13  
Old 09-15-2013, 02:37 PM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by InsaneMystic View Post
I have the rare luxury of it being completely irrelevant to my life, seeing as fluid bonding is forever off the table with me to start with.

And I say "luxury" for one reason only: no need to meddle in what I see as a partner's private life. Their sex life, their STD risk, their business - not mine. It allows me to set a clearer boundary than would be possible if there were a chance of getting infected myself... I know I'd struggle with the feeling of being meddling/nosy if I had to weigh up their privacy versus my bodily health; this way, I can leave their privacy completely untouched.
No sex is risk-free -- sure you may use barriers, but what it a condom slips or breaks? And even with perfect barrier use, there is a not-insignificant chance of getting infected with HPV and HSV. I'm not saying your system isn't the right one for you, I'm just saying that to call a partner's status irrelevant because there's no chance of a risk is inaccurate.
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Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.
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  #14  
Old 09-15-2013, 06:58 PM
InsaneMystic InsaneMystic is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnabelMore View Post
No sex is risk-free -- sure you may use barriers, but what it a condom slips or breaks? And even with perfect barrier use, there is a not-insignificant chance of getting infected with HPV and HSV. I'm not saying your system isn't the right one for you, I'm just saying that to call a partner's status irrelevant because there's no chance of a risk is inaccurate.
I wasn't talking about barriers... even accidental fluid bonding is off the table with me. "No sex", however, is risk-free.
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