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  #51  
Old 03-19-2011, 09:31 PM
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BlackUnicorn BlackUnicorn is offline
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I know it's not supposed to be funny, but there's is something I find amusing to no end with two 'submissives' writing down house rules and then bitching about a third who isn't willing to play by them .

Women can be so hard to please sometimes .
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  #52  
Old 03-19-2011, 11:49 PM
HappiestManAlive HappiestManAlive is offline
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Oh, I see the irony, lol, especially from the outside. But in truth it's not quite like that. The "house rules" is a part of their sub contract (I find no end of humor in that term), along with all the rst, hard limits and such. They don't like the idea of being collared and held to their contracts when our "3rd gf" - whom they dislike - has no such "restrictions". It makes thm feel as though they are submissive to her, or rather that she would view it as such. And frankly, knowing Adrian as well as I do, she would throw it in their faces, whether intentionally or not.

The fact is, she has to go. I'm too nice to put her on the street with no vehicle and very little money -and she is blatantly taking advantage of that, though she sees it differently. Such will not be the case much longer.
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  #53  
Old 03-27-2011, 08:47 AM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
From what I know having been here for two years is that many people who have had a successful experience with unicorns just found them by chance, rather than by searching... it seems to me that people have a good friend who turns into something more and then they share their lives together.
For the record, this is exactly how my three-person relationship came together. I'm the "unicorn" in this situation in that I'm a bi female who got involved with a married couple, though not in most of the other senses that people use that word. We were friends in college and stayed in touch afterwards, I was invited into their bed for a threesome, and as time went on I started dating one member of the couple. No plans or schemes or expectations, just natural development over time. Like you and yours boys, RP, we're a vee, not a triad (thus I can't claim true "unicorn" status), but in my case the two "wings" (that is to say me and my girlfriend's lovely husband) are also sexual partners.

Anyway, it's just nice to see the circumstances of my situation described as the basis for what is more likely to work.
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  #54  
Old 04-02-2011, 04:10 AM
koifish koifish is offline
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In a good poly-fi triad, the unicorn can get a lot of love and care from two people instead of one. A group can be a challenging, but fun and sweet dynamic.
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  #55  
Old 06-04-2011, 06:28 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by toralatigra View Post
we're out there, you just have to be open to us.
Quote:
Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
hey. Would you be willing to write on this thread about what's in it for a unicorn? I would love to know what would make your heart go pitter patter...
RP asked me to comment on this thread since it would seem not many unicorns have responded here.

I think one common thing that I've liked reading in this thread are the people who have brought up to think of unicorn's not as some third, outside, obtainable thing, but as another person. I personally am not really a big fan of the term unicorn since it makes me feel like I'm not a normal person. Or that I am that conquest or addition to a relationship.

When I've talked with a couple, one of the things I preface is my desire to have relationships with each of them, the model mentioned earlier of a&b, b&c, a&c, and a,b &c - is the exact thing I desire. The original couple have things unique to them, that's what made them a couple in the first place, if I try to have a relationship with them - I will always be the third wheel. However if we cultivate relationships as the individuals we are, then I will become an equal in the triad - or at least that's how I see it working/would hope it happens. I think part of it is that if the couple is open to developing relationships as individuals, it shows that the couple is more apt to see me as an equal member, rather than as a secondary thought.

So RP also asked me to comment on what makes my heart go pitter patter, so I think I'll tie that into what's in it for me as a 'unicorn' or as that single bi girl looking for a couple.

There are things about men and women that are very unique. The touch of a man even holding a mans hand differs greatly from the touch or holding the hand of a woman. I love the sensations of both though! Part of the draw of a couple, for me anyways, is that not only would I be satisfying both my needs/desires for a man and a woman, but it would allow me to express my love in many different ways. I find that I express love differently with a man, than I do with a woman. But the other part of the draw is that I know the couple is very capable of love already - by being a couple and having been together for however long (ideally a few years before I would enter the picture) I would be able to see how much love they have for each other, and know that that love is going to be coming my way as well!

Other people have pointed out that an advantage is more love... well I think that's true for all of polyamory - so really the main advantage is not having to deny myself loving a man and a woman.... I dont have to choose one or the other! And that's a big part of what makes my heart go pitter patter - Not having to choose, always having someone to do the things I enjoy doing with - be it him and we go to football games together because she doesnt like football, but i happen to love it! - or her and I go to a spa once a month and soak up the girly goodness of a spa day - which he isn't so into. And when we all come back together, we can cook together, love together, cuddle together... etc... I love being around people, so a triad that allows me to express myself in all aspects of who I am... it just makes me so excited!

RP - I hope this helps, sorry it such a long post!
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  #56  
Old 06-04-2011, 08:01 PM
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thank you! long posts? Not a problem... fill your boots. Write as much as you want. I'm so glad that an actual "unicorn," (sorry, the term isn't your fav.) is saying it, rather than me... it makes the info far more valid and personal...
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  #57  
Old 09-04-2013, 12:27 PM
Ajcemt Ajcemt is offline
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Default Hopeful unicorn

I just started a ffm relationship as a unicorn, so I m not an expert. In fact had you asked me a week ago if this is where I wouldn't have believed it. A lot of threads are negative to the unicorn, and I wanted to speak out and explain what I get out of our relationship. For the record, i feel like I won the lottery. I am equally attracted to both of them for very different reasons. I have the safety and the freedom to explore in a monagamous relationship. I am fulfilling my fantasies that I never thought could happen, and at the end of the day I walk away with friends I enjoy being around. So I guess I want to encourage unicorn hunters to keep up the vigiliant search. We are out there and we are looking too.
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  #58  
Old 11-14-2013, 03:27 PM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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Hey Ajcemt, how is it going now, 3 months later? What is the dynamic like with your two partners?
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