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Old 08-26-2013, 06:06 AM
queenb queenb is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 4
Question Totally new and seeking insight

Ok so, my husband and I recently began to open up our relationship to a non-monogamous one. Since I'm so new at this, I am a little confused about the behavior of one person I've been dating. For background, I am a woman, married to a man and the person I'm dating is also a man, who has previously been in a non-monogamous relationship.

A little chronology:

1. I met the guy for a casual date, had good conversation, decided to see him again.
2. Met guy again, sexytimes ensued. Guy starts saying mushy things during/right after.
3. Continued talking with guy but out of town, so I didn't see him for a couple weeks.
4. Guy begins to withdraw, I ask him if he actually likes me, cause I had thought he did. He says he does and even seriously considered not moving an hour away after meeting me, but then decided against it since I would never be a primary relationship for him, but that he wanted to continue to see each other.
5. Guy withdraws more, starts talking about exes (particularly one that had been rather rejecting), and starts telling me he's trying to "figure it out" and that I might be wanting more time than he can give and that can we take a step back and just hang out. In the meantime, he hangs out with me a number of times despite his apparent ambivalence, which results in cuddling and general non-sexuality (much to my disappointment).
6. At this time, we've had 5x more friend-like interactions as compared with sexual/relationshipy interactions. He says he's NOT ambivalent, just busy and "trying to figure it out".


1. What the hell is going on here?
2. Does this guy actually "like" me and if so, is he just back burnering me til he finds someone more available?
3. Does this guy actually just like me more as a friend?
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