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Old 02-14-2010, 02:58 AM
katharinerose katharinerose is offline
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Between the Sound and Rainier
Posts: 14
Default New and still finding my way

Where to start....

I married my first girlfriend, C over 5 years ago, and we've been together since 2001. I love her more than anything, and she's the person I want have kids and grow old with. At the same time, I feel like I'm missing something.

Back before and in the year after the wedding, we had a male friend, T. They had a very close, somewhat erotic relationship which she felt guilty about even though I really didn't mind. I was rather attracted to him too, and eventually we had a one-time-only threesome. We moved to different parts of the country, and ever since I've missed the times the three of us would hang out and snuggle under piles of blankets. Having both of them there just felt so right. I don't know if I'll ever have that again, but it would be nice to try.

I also want to explore sex with guys, which I've never done (other than the above threesome which was rather limited in scope). At this point, I'd really like to find a FWB situation, emphasis on "friends." C is intellectually fine with this, but we don't know how it will really go. And to top it all off, I've never dated, and have no idea how to go about finding people that I would like and won't write me off as unavailable the minute I mention my wife.

I expect this will be an interesting journey, and a good one. Just knowing that C is open to me being with someone else has lifted a lot of the weight of thinking I'd never be able to love or be sexual with anyone else, and the conversations we've had have brought us closer.
So in search of love and laughter, I'll be travelling 'cross this land,
Never sure of where I'm going, for I haven't any plan.
And in time when you are ready, come and join me, take my hand
And together we'll share life out on the loose.

Dancing about Architecture: A Journey into Polyamory
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