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Old 08-10-2013, 04:05 PM
Gabriella Gabriella is offline
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 13
Default I've been lurking for years....

....so I may as well introduce myself

My name is Gabriella and I'm in a married open relationship. My hubby could very easily be in a poly relationship and I've been lurking here forever to try to understand it. Maybe I should tell you more about myself.

I'm not very good at connecting with people face to face. I can't read body language at all; it's like a foreign language. All of the other relationships I have had before him started out with me thinking "I should probably be dating", looking around at the guys I knew, and deciding who I would have the most luck with. This includes my first marriage. I would like them, but I wouldn't have the experience of falling in love with them. My current marriage started with a kiss the first time we were alone together and I fell hard

I feel I needed to explain this to make this next part make sense. We're currently in a sexually open relationship, but my husband said he would be so happy if I fell in love with someone. The idea of either of us falling in love with anyone else makes my physically ill. I only have my experience loving him, so all I see is that same intensity for all love relationships. Intellectually I know that's not the case, but my heart is firmly in control in this matter.

The other problem is my lack of ability in meeting people. My lack of body language knowledge is holding me back. We went to a big swingers dance last year. Afterwards he asked me why I didn't talk to any of the people checking me out. I never noticed! I have to force myself to look at people in the eye; I'm used to seeing them as blobs not to bump into

If you made it this far, congratulations! I don't know how much I'll post, but ll keep lurking to see what insights I can get from all of you!

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