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  #41  
Old 06-27-2013, 02:08 PM
gorgeouskitten gorgeouskitten is offline
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Originally Posted by GalaGirl View Post
I'd let it go.

To me it sounds like you could think about how you process "disappointed" as a feeling in general.

Whether it is the disappointment like it stinging he doesn't make major life decisions like changing jobs and moving with you in mind at this time.

Or the disappointment of breaking up later down the road if you ask questions in the dating time to get to know each other better and come to find you are not compatible.

It's just going to be what it is as it unfolds.

And some feelings are fun to feel and some are not. That also just is what it is.

But learning how to cope with disappointments is a skill you could develop. Perhaps doing that could help you reduce the anxiety when faced with these things?

Because you could then tell yourself "Whatever it is, I can handle it. I've handled things before. I can handle them again."

Galagirl
Thanks Gala girl, you are quite right. though im in my thirties, i could still use some work on processing strategies.
Side note, we actually know each other quite well, have for years, just have not been dating the full time. Unless you mean getting to know each other better in a more intimate emotional sense.

I actually did speak to him again this morning, and he clarified that the reason he was talking to me about it, was that i WOULD be part of the discussion if he considered a move, and he didnt want that to come out of left feeled but wanted me to know what was on his mind. So, it seems I kind of took the whole conversation wrong.
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  #42  
Old 06-27-2013, 02:30 PM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Side note, we actually know each other quite well, have for years, just have not been dating the full time. Unless you mean getting to know each other better in a more intimate emotional sense.
That is exactly what I mean. You may have known him for years in the role of "friend" but not very long in the role of "dating partner."

Quote:
I actually did speak to him again this morning, and he clarified that the reason he was talking to me about it, was that i WOULD be part of the discussion if he considered a move, and he didnt want that to come out of left feeled but wanted me to know what was on his mind. So, it seems I kind of took the whole conversation wrong.
See? Still learning how to communicate with each other in the new relationship shape. There's going to be bumps along the way.

Could try to relax, let it unfold how it will unfold. Next time something confuses you, could ask for a clarify right then.

And if learning how to process feelings like "disappointed" is part of what can help you relax? Could spend some time working on that then.

Where do you the "disappointed" stems from? What's the trigger?

Hang in there.

Galagirl
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