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  #21  
Old 06-21-2013, 05:00 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Originally Posted by Inyourendo View Post
Lol probably still act like a dick too :P
I'm sorry, i didn't quite catch that. Would you please mind explaining the meaning of it all? I'm perceiving some hostility but i want to be sure that is what it is before i go tattle-tale to Imaginary Illusion.

Thank you so much!
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  #22  
Old 06-21-2013, 05:39 PM
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Inyourendo Inyourendo is offline
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Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
I'm sorry, i didn't quite catch that. Would you please mind explaining the meaning of it all? I'm perceiving some hostility but i want to be sure that is what it is before i go tattle-tale to Imaginary Illusion.

Thank you so much!
Just reading. I dig your posts a lot. You remind of House lol

Err teasing
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  #23  
Old 06-21-2013, 05:56 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Originally Posted by Inyourendo View Post
Just reading. I dig your posts a lot. You remind of House lol

Err teasing

That's cool. i too was teasing. You can say "dick" as many times as you like in this thread.

Just a general advisory - the sky is NOT falling. This breakup took me by surprise, but my partner is taking it as well as can be expected. We are "if it ain't broken, don't fix it" types. It might take a week or so to get used to having Spouse there when i get home every night, but we love each other so it isn't a problem. It just feels weird. This is the first time i've been in a relationship with someone who started and stopped one with someone else the whole time we've been together. All my other non-monogamous relationships have over-lapped the get-togethers and break-ups, or didn't last long enough to notice.
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  #24  
Old 06-21-2013, 09:11 PM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
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Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
That's cool. i too was teasing. You can say "dick" as many times as you like in this thread.

Just a general advisory - the sky is NOT falling. This breakup took me by surprise, but my partner is taking it as well as can be expected. We are "if it ain't broken, don't fix it" types. It might take a week or so to get used to having Spouse there when i get home every night, but we love each other so it isn't a problem. It just feels weird. This is the first time i've been in a relationship with someone who started and stopped one with someone else the whole time we've been together.
How is the adjustment to having more time together going?

DICK! (I kind of wanted to say 'cock' but wasn't sure about how that would fly) ... (you're thinking of flying 'cock' now... aren't you)
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  #25  
Old 06-22-2013, 08:17 AM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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How is the adjustment to having more time together going?

DICK! (I kind of wanted to say 'cock' but wasn't sure about how that would fly) ... (you're thinking of flying 'cock' now... aren't you)


Grooovy. We still see each other as little as we did three days ago.

S is changing jobs over the next few weeks, so is preoccupied with that. We'll get a few days logged in during the first week of July, i expect. I'm at the camp site this weekend, again.
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  #26  
Old 06-26-2013, 02:00 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Default Soap Opera

It's been about a week since this "break-up" and i have learned a few things such that i will not be very happy if they get back together (which is a looming possibility now). I will accept it, but i will not give it my joyous approval. This is something i can't do anything about; i can't change the way the other person believes or reacts to their surroundings, no matter what i do that IS in my power to make it easier for them. I am trying to not act "controlling" while still making sure i say what i think.

I have found this forum very helpful when it comes to taking my own advice. I think i have observed (that is, i am not taking all available data into consideration) that most people who post here are looking for other people's answers. What i do is ask myself, "if i read my problem as a post by a stranger, with only this information to go by, what would *I* say to this person?" I use this method often and it works pretty well.

Right now things are still working themselves out, but when we have moved forward a bit, i'll probably update with more specifics.
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  #27  
Old 06-26-2013, 06:03 PM
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SNeacail SNeacail is offline
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Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
I have found this forum very helpful when it comes to taking my own advice. I think i have observed (that is, i am not taking all available data into consideration) that most people who post here are looking for other people's answers. What i do is ask myself, "if i read my problem as a post by a stranger, with only this information to go by, what would *I* say to this person?"
I do this . I've been in the middle of a fight, only to realize that I'm doing something that someone here got called to the carpet on. I stop think for a minute and shift gears, while my husbands standing there trying to figure out what just happened.

Sometimes when we are immersed in the pain, drama, heartache, etc. it's easy to either get bogged down by all the small details or get so overwhelmed by the whole thing that we can't see the details. It's easier for outsiders to get past these road blocks and start asking hard questions.
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  #28  
Old 06-28-2013, 04:06 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Originally Posted by SNeacail View Post
Sometimes when we are immersed in the pain, drama, heartache, etc. it's easy to either get bogged down by all the small details or get so overwhelmed by the whole thing that we can't see the details. It's easier for outsiders to get past these road blocks and start asking hard questions.
I agree that this is a thing.

However, i find myself at a place where i can imagine what other people (specific individuals AND people in general, or people on this forum in general, etc.) would say to me; and also at a place where i trust my own judgment enough that i don't feel the need to check it with others. When i do, i usually ask one of my closest friends, which includes my partner(s).

I am coming to the end of the train ride now so i don't have time to get into the "hard questions" part of it all. But i have some thoughts about that and perhaps will editorialize them in the near future.
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  #29  
Old 07-08-2013, 02:02 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Default Update (boring)

Friday evening Spouse and their ex had the final breakup talk. I don't know specific words that were said, but they are still on friendly terms and i just asked spouse "are you ok?"

While they were doing that, i was on my long holiday weekend at the camp resort and i met a new person and got a little freaky with them. Make that quite freaky. Not freaky in a creepy way but freaky in a way that is going to give me a use for these communication talents of mine that i have, lol.

You know how you have sex with someone and it's all good then afterward when you're typing to them you say something and think "gee maybe that didn't sound the way i meant it, so you write another one and another one to explain the last one? It was like that. But Spouse was pretty happy for me & i think it turns them on that people find me attractive in their absence or whatever, lol.
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  #30  
Old 07-08-2013, 07:32 PM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
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Sounds like things are going reasonably well; glad to hear it.
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