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Old 06-17-2013, 04:33 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,716

I was reminded today that when people cheat on me or don't tell the truth or decide its easier not to talk to me rather than deal with my emotions that that is THEIR issues and not mine. Separating it from my worth as a partner is an ongoing process. It makes me face and deal with my issues as a result, but it isn't my fault or issue that started the cycle.

I was reminded that when a partner betrays trust its incredibly difficult to be objective and near impossible to see everything you ever had with them to not have all been a lie. Untangling my truth among all the pain is all I can do. Working on making me better by dealing with the core issues is key to figuring out what will work long term no matter what type of relationship/s I end up in. I was reminded that it can be done without pushing others away by accepting love and support from the people who care about me, and trusting that I am loved even if it's not coming to me in the form I want it.

I like the word untangle. I feel that is what I am doing. Dividing the truth from the lies, spreading out the silence, what is known from what isn't known and what subtle messages and signs I have been given of what is going on and where I should go.

Thanks to the person who wrote. It meant a lot to me that you understand something of what my past is through your own experience and had some insight as to what might work better. Every little bit counts and is helpful.
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Last edited by redpepper; 06-17-2013 at 04:37 AM.
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breaking up, casual sex, coming out to family, communication, family, kids, mono/poly, moving in, poly-fi, vee

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