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Old 08-28-2012, 07:01 PM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,285

I'm not single, but I've been in the position of being so and getting involved with coupled folks in various ways before. I would be really pissed off in anyone called me a "unicorn" because the connotations for unicorns (disposable, naive, being used) and unicorn hunters (self-centered, unrealistic, users) are all SO negative. For that same reason I definitely wouldn't claim that title for myself. Calling myself a unicorn would also imply that I'm looking to get involved with both members of a couple equally, and I would never want to make that call before meeting the couple in question and knowing for sure that 1) I actually had chemistry and compatibility with both of them, and 2) they actually had the space in their hearts and lives for the triad and the dyads that would then be created, which of course is so rare.
Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.
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Old 08-29-2012, 12:53 AM
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CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Upstate New York, USA
Posts: 1,467

I agree, calling yourself a Unicorn implies a lot more than a single, bisexual female who wants a relationship with a couple.

Often it adds in an *exclusive* relationship where the couple stays dominant and only is with the single girl when it suits them. They make the rules, and the single girl is expected to live by them.

Yes, that's the stereotype, but you see it all too often, I'm afraid.

"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb
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Old 08-29-2012, 05:57 AM
Mojo Mojo is offline
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Somewhere in the 4 corners
Posts: 15
Default Apology

I sadly used the term "hunting" in a post long ago when I first discovered this whole community. Just wanna say sorry to all that offended. I met a girl and by far she was a life changing event and probably the most amazing girl I will ever fall in love with. Its not right to label her or any woman this. I will say in the end she was my beautiful muse, that inspired and made me feel more love for all of those around me.

Last edited by Mojo; 08-29-2012 at 06:01 AM.
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Old 08-29-2012, 01:08 PM
Pliglet Pliglet is offline
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 45

I call myself a unicorn because it has been my fDP's term of endearment for me since long before we discovered the poly community.

I have to admit, learning the more negative terms associated with it (naive, pet, being 'hunted' etc) makes me really dislike it. I still let her call me that, because she has for such a long time (2 years +) and it has a totally diff meaning
But I'd probably stop referring to myself as such! (which means changing the title of my blog lol)
Our FMFTriad + 3 children + 2 pets = one crazy household
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Old 08-29-2012, 09:11 PM
kittycat kittycat is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 3

I call myself a unicorn in a lighthearted, joking way. I am a young, bisexual, polyamorous, reasonably attractive woman, and have been hit on by the "couple-seeking-third" more times than I can count.

I have absolutely no desire for this kind of relationship. I am a unicorn who is constantly hunted but doesn't want to be caught... this unicorn likes her freedom!
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Old 08-29-2012, 10:11 PM
DeniseTotallyUniqueUn1958 DeniseTotallyUniqueUn1958 is offline
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: SE PA
Posts: 7

Thank you all for your very informative replies! I don't think... I know! I won't be calling me a unicorn!

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Old 12-05-2012, 02:45 PM
curiouscpl2 curiouscpl2 is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 1
Default lonley

Hey sorry to hear what you are going threw, we have the opposite issue we would love to find someone like you. My wife wants me to find someone she can hang out with outside the bedroom that can share our lives with us in and out of the bedroom. Maybe we arent looking in the right places or we live in the wrong place but it seems much harder than it would appear..
best of luck everyone
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Old 12-05-2012, 07:37 PM
EVEMSW EVEMSW is offline
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 6
Talking Thoughts regarding "unicorns"

I too am sorry to hear that you have had such a hard time finding a couple that you fit with. It can be very frustrating and I don't understand why some couples don't just look for people that are looking for play partners instead of pretending to want a relationship. I did the play thing for a couple of years while I was healing from a bad divorce. Then I met a wonderful man whois amazing and has everything I want in a man. Only issue, I'm Bi and need a feamle in my life as well. I would love to have a female that would love us both... As an equal in the relationship understanding that you can love more than one person and it may be different but as good and deep as you love the other person.

He and I have played with a few women that were good friends but just looking to play and we both realized that's not what we want... There really isn't anything missing from our relationship and no reason to settle or swing so to speak, we are both past that. We want love... All the way around. So just remember there are couples out there that want a real woman with all her emotions, needs and desires.
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Old 05-07-2013, 10:57 PM
pantrike pantrike is offline
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Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 1

We are a couple that is looking for that elusive unicorn, but we do not have those limitations that some of you talk about. We want to get to know the woman and if all of us fit, then have her join our family for life. It is more about the relationship than the sex for us, sex is only a part of a relationship, does not make one. We are just looking for the one to complete us, and share everything life has to offer.
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Old 05-07-2013, 11:09 PM
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Natja Natja is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 838

Oh dear......
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adding a partner, attitude, expectations, love, one penis policy, opp, polyamory, polyfidelity, triad, truth, unicorn, unicorn definition, unicorn hunters, unicorn hunting, unicorns

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