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  #31  
Old 04-22-2013, 09:56 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
Thank you, i appreciate the effort you made to bring it here for everyone's benefit. It seems people are more concerned (if they are indeed concerned at all) with definitions of recently-invented words or words adopted into slang forms that are specific to polyamory (compersion, triad, unicorn, polythisthattheotherwhatever), but it is also important to know the definitions and proper usage of established vocabulary words. The definitions i gave above, while perhaps not phrased in a scientifically correct manner, did effectively communicate the mistake LR made when it came to the usage of the word "opaque".
You're welcome. I agree. I'd lobby for a definitionally uniform society. Polyamory thru universally monodefinitive lexicon. Though, i suspect I am being theoretically liberal while ideologically unilateral and proponentially promoting polyfrustration, potentially.
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  #32  
Old 04-22-2013, 10:16 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NutBusterX View Post
You're welcome. I agree. I'd lobby for a definitionally uniform society. Polyamory thru universally monodefinitive lexicon. Though, i suspect I am being theoretically liberal while ideologically unilateral and proponentially promoting polyfrustration, potentially.


Yes, that is correct. Or rather, it could be.
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  #33  
Old 04-23-2013, 04:23 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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I appreciate the detailed definitions. I LOVE learning word definitions.
But-I admit to being only half "tuned in" the last week or so because I'm in Hawaii on vacation.
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  #34  
Old 04-29-2013, 08:32 PM
Janelle Janelle is offline
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Elorahd,
I am in a V and my bf is the hinge, I definately can relate to trouble on one side spilling over to the other side. We choose to communicate openly about his other relationship. Being able to talk things over with your mate can do multiple things,
1 It can allow him to vent. Needing no reply or advise.
2 It can allow him to get another point of view.
3 It can allow him to be heard (sometimes this is all people really want/need).

Now this seems one sided but the above, if practiced in a positive manner, can be acheived mostly in 30 minutes to an hour. The benefit to you is the mood will stabalize/improve and you can move on to more interesting topics, ideas or activities.

I understand that some people can't/won't discuss OSO's and their issues. I dont like exclusion or omission. If this is what you prefer then I can't offer any suggestions on how to deal with it. I know its difficult to see my SO sad or upset so I would rather help to ease the frustration than to let them stew in the emotion and possibly ruin my time with them.

Quote:
Do you have rules in place to keep this from happening?
I find when you restrict or set rules upon communication (especially about feelings)some aren't as clear as what is okay to share and whats not.

Anyone else have any input on this? I am also looking for alternate ways this is dealt with.
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  #35  
Old 04-30-2013, 04:56 AM
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The only fix I know of for problems from one relationship spilling into another relationship is to increase and improve communication. I don't know of any rules that would prevent spillage from happening at all. I think you have to get used to each other's roles in each other's lives.
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