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Old 04-06-2013, 06:23 PM
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Phy Phy is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Germany
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Because-the more she's written since your comment-the more I tend to beleive that when she said she wasn't poly it didn't mean "I am no longer poly in my heart" as much as "i am no longer free to do poly" (reasons don't matter for my point).
That was my impression to begin with-and it does mesh very well with Galagirl as an example. Because GG identifies as poly-inside of herself, but she "can't" live poly (due to personal responsibility choices).
Therefore-by many standards she is "not poly". Because her actions aren't poly.
I think this technicality is what caused the confusion & I think it's an important detail-because we are talking about people from a variety of different countries/backgrounds and languages. Without verifying that FOL meant it to be she was done with poly period... versus "I am trying to find a way to function in the new reality I am faced with in order to not risk my kids being drug through a court battle of grand proportions" (which she was clearly threatened with in point blank terms, publicly on this board).
When one considers the whole of what was posted-instead of just hte one or two posts in her blog-it becomes clear, this is a poly person who is in duress.
She may work through that duress and be mono.
But what if this is just this weeks survival mechanism?
Thanks for understanding, LR. That was why I wasn't able to understand the difference, because that's exactly how I saw it. Maybe there is too much interpeting going on in my case, but I got the impression of 'work in progress' as well. A poly person going through some rough changes and adjustments in her life. I understand that it's hard to set a timeframe for how long it is appropriate to talk about mono-stuff on a poly forum. But in her case it was just so short to really judge what was coming out of all that mess and uproar.
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Facts: 30, female, bi, v-type relationship with Sward (husband, straight, mono) and Lin (boyfriend, straight, mono), poly-fi and co-primary.

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