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  #11  
Old 06-08-2012, 05:35 AM
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NovemberRain NovemberRain is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PinkDragon View Post
I love both giving and receiving gifts. And I absolutely adore cards. I don't know why, I just do. And, I have every card I've ever been given.
When my mom passed, it took us several years to sift through all her stuff (in part due to emotions, more in part due to the distance, and a little because she was a bit of a pack rat. Though she preferred to call herself 'a well-stocked Cancer').
I discovered she had every card I had ever given her. Ever. Like, since I was a child. She died when I was 42. All the mailed ones still in their envelopes. It was kind of a hoot to go through them.

As a child, my parents had one friend who always gave me a fabulous gift. It was always something unique and that made me feel special, like he had picked it just for me. But it was a rare thing, and not the usual way of gifts among my family, so that may be why that wasn't high for me. Just wanted to note to you gift-givers that even if it's not someone's language, you could be creating lifetime memorable impressions.
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Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own...
Robert A. Heinlein

Me: female, bi, (formerly hinge of a vee)
with FirstBoyFriend (FBF)(moderately long-distance)
and no longer with CurrentBoyFriend (CBF)(who lives in the apartment building next door)
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  #12  
Old 06-17-2012, 05:27 AM
Dreamy Dreamy is offline
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I think it's my least favorite language to receive, but it's a significant way I give/express love. I'm glad to read this thread and understand more about it.
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  #13  
Old 03-29-2013, 09:22 PM
willowstar willowstar is offline
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My DH is a gifter, but I am a Time-oriented person. He is a genius at finding things, and all our close friends know that if you really want something, just mention it around him and it will somehow be found or "show up" within a couple of weeks. He is constantly bringing little things home from garage sales, Salvation Army, or the like. He has found me cauldrons at the Salvation Army, which was one of the coolest ever! I finally did have to tell him that he didn't need to bring things home just so I could see them... LOL. But he has found me some amazing gifts that no one else probably would have given me. In our initial courtship, we worked at the same place, and his schedule was earlier than mine. I would come to work and find little things on my desk. Pack of gum, a book, stuff like that. Very romantic, no one had ever done little things like that for me.

I am time oriented, if you are important to me I will change my schedule, block out times on the calendar, and I feel most loved when I know people have done that for me. The gifts are nice, but not at all important. The fact that you have "Made room in your life for me" is most important.

We had a long time friend with whom we tried a few years back to see if we could form a relationship with her. One of the things I noticed about her was that she was not really into the gifting or the time. She was event oriented. So, in order to get her out with us, we needed to invite her to a specific event, dinner party, concert, etc. I took it personally for a while, because I couldnt just say to her, "lets get together Saturday! What do you want to do?". I felt slighted because it wasnt enough to just hang out with us, I needed to have a plan for her to consider it. We realized that wouldnt work for us in terms of a relationship, but are still friends, though we only see her about once a year.

Thanks for posting, it is good to talk about and remind myself of what I resonate with in terms of love. <3


OK, I am Editing here because I just took the time to go and take the actual quiz, and I came up as primarily Acts of Service, and secondarily as Words of Affirmation. Interesting, I always thought I was a Time person. But after reading the definitions, I think the quiz is pretty accurate. Which makes a lot of sense when it comes to my boyfriend, he is a giver of Acts of Service AND Words of Affirmation, over and over. Its one of the things I love about him.


Willow

Last edited by willowstar; 03-29-2013 at 10:54 PM.
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  #14  
Old 06-09-2013, 11:25 AM
Request Request is offline
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You are very talented in understanding a man. The best gift in the relationship is a special attitude.
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  #15  
Old 06-18-2013, 01:12 AM
Josie Josie is offline
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I absolutely love receiving and giving gifts. I probably love giving them more than receiving them. I like to make notes of all the things people I care about point out that they want and surprise them months later, after they've forgotten about it completely. I love doing personalised gifts and cards as well, I'm not very artistic but I do my best to put in something personal or something to make them laugh.

I haven't taken the Love Language test but I'm pretty sure I'd be gift oriented. I'm just crazy about how little gifts and actions can make someone's face light up. Last year was my boyfriend's last year of university and he was really stressed all the time and didn't get any time to get things for himself. So I'd go get a six-pack of coke to keep him going when he had all-nighters or make some homemade soup when he was ill and just drop it off and leave.

I had a boyfriend once who kind of dropped off the face of the earth for a month and didn't tell me quite what was wrong, just that he was working through some things - and all of the biscuits in the house whilst he was at it. I wanted to do something, but knew if I met him, he'd feel too guilty to tell me to go away. So I bought some of his favourite biscuits, attached a 'Hope you feel better soon' message to it, rang his doorbell, and ran. He said it was one of the nicest things someone had done for him.

And it doesn't always have to be something bought, or an item. I really like getting creative with what would be best for the person at the time. My girlfriend was feeling really bad whilst visiting her parents recently and posted online that all she wanted was to be with her partners or hear a story that would make it better.....so I wrote her a short story that featured how her whole poly journey started, included both her partners and was written like a children's story with each of us as woodland creatures.

It was my birthday recently and my boyfriend had next to no money. So he bought me a book, and has been reading it to me, chapter by chapter almost every night. He feels bad for not spending much money on me. I feel amazing because it was such a perfect gift.

....This is a much longer post than I had intended, although I guess that goes to show how very much I love presents.
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