Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 03-18-2013, 08:18 PM
DemeterBlessings DemeterBlessings is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 9
Question What do you call people who dislike, hate, or are afraid of the polyamorous?

I'm coming across a lot of ignorance which doesn't surprise me, but I need to post something about this and need a word that parallels homophobia. But the words "poly-phobia" and "poly-racist" have other meanings that have nothing to do with polyamory, and looking up polyamory-phobic just brings up comments about people who are polyamorous that are assumed to be commitment-phobic. There isn't a word listed in the vocab section of polyamorysociety.org either. Has anyone come across a word for this? Thanks!
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 03-18-2013, 09:07 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Nowhere
Posts: 1,647
Default

If you find the word you're looking for, what are your expectations? Will you present the word to these people whom you say reject non-monogamy, and they will say to themselves, "wow it all makes sense now. My attitude is prejudiced and circumscribed. I should change because the way it is now, i am just like a person who is racist or homophobic, and those two attitudes are wrong. I don't want to be wrong, therefore i will accept polyamory the same way i accept gay people."

Is that what you think this new vocabulary word will accomplish?
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 03-18-2013, 09:34 PM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 2,852
Default

Is this for a paper or something you are writing? The only thing I can think of is "uncomfortable with polyamory."

Such as "People who are uncomfortable with polyamory" perhaps? Could that work in your thing? At least as a place holder til you get the rest of of it done?

GL!
Galagirl
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 03-18-2013, 10:03 PM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,087
Default

In my experience changing people's attitudes requires finesse, not attack.
There isn't a term.
How I deal with the fearful is to describe my real life and let them see how our family interacts.
So far-no negative outcome from that approach. Even the religious who "dont approve" acknowledge that we are making it work.
__________________
"Love As Thou Wilt"
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 03-18-2013, 10:07 PM
ThatGirlInGray ThatGirlInGray is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Northern Cali
Posts: 552
Default

I know lots of people who are uncomfortable with polyamory, but I wouldn't say they hate it. I wonder if "prejudiced against polyamory" would be more appropriate. "Prejudiced" speaks more towards an unreasonable and close-minded dislike, hate, or fear.
__________________
~~~~~~~~~
Pan Female, Hinge in a V between my mono (straight) husband, Monochrome and my poly (pan) partner, ThatGuyInBlack
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 03-19-2013, 08:50 AM
Tonberry Tonberry is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,369
Default

Mononormative?
I've actually seen "polyphobic" a lot. Didn't realise it had another meaning.

I don't think we need a word for any kind of discrimination or prejudice. We can just tell someone they're prejudiced or bigoted.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 03-19-2013, 03:51 PM
Malfunktions's Avatar
Malfunktions Malfunktions is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: NB, Canada
Posts: 203
Default

Haters be hatin'!

I have heard the term "mono-strict".

I would use tat one I think...
__________________
It's just me, my ramblings and the elevator music in my head.

OKC Profile

Me: bi, reformed wild-child turned mom and house maid LOL
Crux: straight/hypersexual, possibly mono?
BC: our son, 5 years
CM: second son 9 months.
Mouse: girlfriend! Status new, feelings not so much.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 03-20-2013, 04:26 AM
Helo's Avatar
Helo Helo is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: California
Posts: 279
Default

Having a term for these people requires giving a fuck about them enough to come up with one.

__________________
=DISCLAIMER=
I am as direct as a T-Rex with 'roid rage and about as subtle. It isn't intended to cause upset, I just prefer to talk plain. There are plenty of other people here who do the nice, polite thing much better than I can. I'm what you'd call a "problem dinner guest."
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 03-20-2013, 05:07 AM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,130
Default

I agree with "prejudiced against polyamory." It emphasizes prejudice, i.e. making a total judgement against someone based on one specific feature, rather than considering their entire personhood.

If you really need a specific word (can't imagine why), I propose "amorist." Racist, sexist, ageist... At first, I was thinking "polyist" but then I realized none of those "ists" suggest being against a specific race, sex, or age group - only against "other" race, sex, or age groups.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tonberry View Post
Mononormative?
I've actually seen "polyphobic" a lot. Didn't realise it had another meaning.

I don't think we need a word for any kind of discrimination or prejudice. We can just tell someone they're prejudiced or bigoted.
Hmm.. except "heteronormative" just means you fit succinctly in the heterosexual box. It doesn't imply that you have anything against homosexuality. So by analogy, mononormative just means you're naturally inclined towards monogamy, not that you necessarily have anything against polyamory.
__________________
Gralson: my husband (works out of town).
Auto: my girlfriend (lives with her husband Zoffee).

The most dangerous phrase in the English language is "we've always done it this way."
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 03-20-2013, 08:25 AM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 7,108
Default

Anti-polyamory?
__________________
The world opens up... when you do.

Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me. ~Bryan Ferry
"Love is that condition in which another person's happiness is essential to your own." ~Robert Heinlein
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 06:59 AM.