Glad it helped.
But what about taking some of those other paragraphs and attempting to put them in terms of wants, needs, and limits? Here's some of what I think I am hearing:
I feel fearful of being disrespected if my BF suddenly becomes a crazy flirt and flirts and picks people up in front of me.
Take it one thing at a time -- you are in the process of taking fitness assessment.
His willingness AND fitness. Your willingness AND fitness. The relationship's willingness AND fitness.
Being willing to entertain the conversation is not being willing to GO THERE just yet. You can still say "NO. NOT FOR ME. It is a personal limitation, there I will not go with you."
Maybe the assessment time reveals that NO, not all 3 components are up to snuff so polyshipping right now is NOT the best time. So it's like "No, not at this time. THESE things would have to be resolved first before considering it again."
Do the work BEFORE hand to avoid pitfalls. There's also agreeing to trying on "a small tiny Opening" like a non-sexual coffee date. Then close back up to digest how that went. You do not have to OPEN UP FULL SPECTRUM right out of the gate, you know. If you decide to experiment.
Take it one thing at a time. Read, assess yourselves. If you DO decide to go there, do it WELL. Not all higgledy-piggledy.
This is your Life. YOU author your own life "Choose your Own Adventure" book as you live it. Choose well.
Last edited by GalaGirl; 03-08-2013 at 07:09 AM.