Embarrassed to admit my wife has a lover…
After years of discussion we've finally taken the plunge into poly. My wife has fallen deeply in love with another man, and I’m pretty ok with that so long as my relationship needs are being fulfilled (they kinda' are but being in NRE my wife still sometimes/at times often thinks about him when she's with me, and is not 'present' which I resent but that’s another issue which we're talking through)
What’s really bugging me right now is that somehow I feel less of a man because my wife feels the need for another, which is crazy as I know I can’t be everything for anyone.
And here’s the really unfair bit – it would be super-cool for me to have another woman, but I’m embarrassed to admit my wife has a lover. WTF?
Is it ego, insecurity, cultural conditioning? What is going on here?