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Old 03-05-2013, 06:44 AM
friday friday is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
Posts: 11
Default Where did you discover the concept of polyamory?

I'm curious, because I see so many different and interesting stories, and I like to look for themes.

As a teenager reading Heinlein I always thought the group marriages sounded like so much fun, that I thought it would be cool to have one in a very abstract way. As an adult once I figured out how much work it was to maintain one successful relationship, the idea seemed much more difficult to obtain. The fact that Kinsey has always been one of my favorite movies also probably helped me to think that poly is something that is not that "out there".

I'd had one open relationship early in my 20's, he was also a Heinlein fan and I think he knew that we were both poly kind of people, but I didn't really analyze it too much.

When I met my husband in my late 20's, it seemed like a no-brainer since he was gay before he met me and I didn't want him to be unhappy with never having the possibility of being with a man again, or not having the possibility of finding love with another man. And the idea of being open to finding another partner just seemed to fit us as a couple.

So I'm curious, what are other people's stories about how you adjusted to the theory of polyamory, and how you came to believe it was the right choice for you? Was it guided by a partner? Was it a burning need to love more than one person? Was it an ideal that you ended up fulfilling or a person in particular (say a third or quad) that brought you to it? Which comes first, chicken and egg style, the theory or the practice? What made it seem like the right and practical choice for you (and your partner[s])?

Last edited by friday; 03-05-2013 at 06:46 AM.
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boundaries, cheating, coming out poly, commitment, defintion, description, descriptions, discovery, dissatisfaction, first time, happiness, history, introduction to poly, learning, mono poly, mono/poly, new to polyamory, opening a relationship, poly, relationship issues, scale

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