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Old 02-16-2013, 10:53 PM
understanding101 understanding101 is offline
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hi

Last edited by understanding101; 02-16-2013 at 11:29 PM.
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Old 02-16-2013, 11:33 PM
WhatHappened WhatHappened is offline
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So you just deleted the entire post????
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Old 02-16-2013, 11:56 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WhatHappened View Post
So you just deleted the entire post????

12 hours: Some do, some don't.
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Old 02-17-2013, 12:02 AM
WhatHappened WhatHappened is offline
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Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
12 hours: Some do, some don't.
So let's talk about something else then! Sports? Weather? The stock market?
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Old 02-17-2013, 12:08 AM
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Helo Helo is offline
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Hopefully it was resolved satisfactorily.
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Old 02-17-2013, 12:31 AM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Helo View Post
Hopefully it was resolved satisfactorily.


Seeing as the original post was made less than 2 hours ago and deleted half an hour afterward, I will go out on a limb and guess that, on the contrary, it was not only not resolved, but after making the post, the OP read the forum guidelines and realized that they didn't want their relative's private business posted on the internet for all to see - forever - so they thought better of it and erased it.

...which is what that 12-hour edit window is there for. Smart person.
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Old 02-17-2013, 12:33 AM
understanding101 understanding101 is offline
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yeah, sorry. I got paranoid. I've been accused of being judgmental by said family member and I don't want to come across that way at all.

I really am at a loss of how to handle this situation, other than distancing myself from them. One person of the couple continues to tell my spouse and I details of his/her affairs, details of their arrangements, details of the arrangements our mutual acquaintances who also are open etc. All of which we find to be totally unnecessary, particularly because we aren't apart of that world. I find it offensive and off putting.

It's just so difficult to watch your family member and their spouse engage in emotional and sexual affairs, even though consensual. Not to mention be apart of their "lie" to other family members who aren't aware of their arrangement.
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Old 02-17-2013, 12:36 AM
WhatHappened WhatHappened is offline
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I personally think they're disrespecting you. I have very strong feelings on politics, theology, religion--that doesn't mean that I need to make sure everyone knows all about it every time I visit them. Especially if I know it would make them uncomfortable or cause tension.
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Old 02-17-2013, 01:15 AM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by understanding101 View Post
yeah, sorry. I got paranoid. I've been accused of being judgmental by said family member and I don't want to come across that way at all.

I really am at a loss of how to handle this situation, other than distancing myself from them. One person of the couple continues to tell my spouse and I details of his/her affairs, details of their arrangements, details of the arrangements our mutual acquaintances who also are open etc. All of which we find to be totally unnecessary, particularly because we aren't apart of that world. I find it offensive and off putting.

It's just so difficult to watch your family member and their spouse engage in emotional and sexual affairs, even though consensual. Not to mention be apart of their "lie" to other family members who aren't aware of their arrangement.
Maybe you'd be better off reading other people's posts and asking questions on things you feel are important to your situation.
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Old 02-17-2013, 01:24 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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I would tell said family member that respect for their lifestyle goes hand in hand with respect for yours; as you dont appreciate hearing details-they need not share.

That said, it never hurts to take some time to consider why you are offended by consenting adults happily interacting with consenting adults. So long as they respectfully don't attempt to persuade you into participation of activities that you don't find an interest in-why waste time and effort being offended?

My friend and ex boyfriend used to frequently say;
"your mind is only as open as the smallest thing you allow to offend it."
Combined with the knowledge that we can only learn via an open mind, I find that quote very inspiring.
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