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  #311  
Old 01-24-2013, 09:32 AM
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rory rory is offline
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*hugs*
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  #312  
Old 01-24-2013, 06:38 PM
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Hugs!
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  #313  
Old 01-24-2013, 11:13 PM
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fuchka fuchka is offline
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Phy - sorry to hear the medical news that will make things trickier on this front. My heart & thoughts are going out to you right now. The topic of children can be a heady mix of practical considerations and emotions for everyone involved. It's great you are in a healthy relationship space to work through this with both Sward and Lin, despite setbacks! Hugs
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  #314  
Old 01-25-2013, 11:13 PM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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I'm so sorry to hear about this roadblock, Phy. I have a good friend who's going through IVF right now. It's been a long, tough year for her, and her self-esteem and joy in life have taken a serious hit as she's been forced to ask herself if she will ever achieve her vision of being a mother. At the same time, it's really forced her to grow, and develop her ideas about who she is and what she wants in life, as she's had to think harder than ever about her future. I am certain that you will all take good care of each other during this time.

I'm sure this is an option that's crossed your mind, but I'll take a moment to give a shout-out to adoption. My sister is adopted, and she's never been anything less than my parents' child and my sibling. I don't know how being poly might complicate an attempt to adopt, and it's not always an easy road to begin with, but it *is* an alternative to consider.
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  #315  
Old 01-26-2013, 12:40 PM
wildflowers wildflowers is offline
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Phy - So sorry you're having to deal with this challenge to your plans and dreams; I know it was really important to you. Hope you can find a resolution that brings you peace.
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  #316  
Old 01-26-2013, 06:46 PM
CherryBlossomGirl CherryBlossomGirl is offline
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Hugs to you, this is not what you had imagined.
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  #317  
Old 02-02-2013, 01:13 AM
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Phy Phy is offline
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What to say, which words to choose to describe the undescribable? Lin got tested, we will never be able to have a biological child. The worst case came true. I don't know how to support him and I don't really know how to react besides being shocked. I am scared and worried for his health, he is under so much stress and as soon as he tries to give in to the pain his heart starts stinging and cramping. I guess that is what scares me most right now. His condition worsening; this meant so much to him.

Thanks for your support, there isn't much we can do besides trying to cope at the moment.
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  #318  
Old 02-02-2013, 03:35 AM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Phy View Post
Thanks for your support, there isn't much we can do besides trying to cope at the moment.
Oh, Phy, I'm so sad for you three and this turn of events.

I have been through something somewhat similar (which I have talked about here before) and "trying to cope at the moment" is a good description as you try to wrap your head(s) around the loss of the dream and plan that you had - this is a time of mourning. The added concern of Lin's physical health ... how stressed you must be.

I wish I could offer words of advice that would magically help you feel better...but I can't*. Tend to each other, take care of each other, love each other...

JaneQ

*PS. During the times after my losses I found myself reacting strongly (negatively) to things that people would say in trying to "help". If you need to vent or commiserate feel free to PM me.
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MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (together 21+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (together 3+ yrs) and MrS's best friend
Lotus: poly bi female, "it's complicated" relationships with Dude/JaneQ/MrS
TT: poly bi male, married to Lotus, FB with JaneQ
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  #319  
Old 02-02-2013, 05:25 AM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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What blows, in such close succession.

We will all be thinking of you and wishing your family the best.
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The major players. Me, 30ish bi female. Gia, girlfriend of 4+ years. Clay, boyfriend/dom. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eddie, roommate & fwb.
The supporting cast. Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler. Dexter, Gia's lover. Helen, Eric's lover. Izzy and Nikki, Clay's partners. Liam, Eddie's husband.
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  #320  
Old 02-03-2013, 04:35 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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I am so sorry, Phy. It is a sad thing. Take comfort in each other, in what you have together right now... I know you all three share deep love for each other and that is very special and beautiful . Don't know what else to say.
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