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Old 01-06-2013, 06:34 AM
Tonberry Tonberry is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Oregon, USA
Posts: 1,444

I absolutely agree with Helo about the original article being out of line. While I don't think it deserved any sexist comments, I definitely think it deserved negative comments. It doesn't matter that what was "wrong" with the guy was being nerdy, as opposed to any other particular taste. What matters is the woman's reaction.

I mean, replace it with something else, it's just as offensive.

"I realised he was a doctor. Strike one. He then told me he was often on call for surgeries. Strike two. I can't believe I wasted time on a guy like this, and I hear he scammed his way into OTHER dates, too!"

The problem isn't her "boundaries" of not dating a nerd (I'd call that tastes, not boundaries). The problem is that A) she doesn't treat the guy with any respect, which is obvious from the fact she choose to go with public humiliation (even named the guy in question, why did she need to do that? She could have stayed vague) and B) she assumes, like it's common sense, that any other woman would also think he's undatable for the same reasons.
Now, NovemberRain, you don't date men with children. Do you consider that nobody else would want to date them? Do you go and warn people to stay away from a guy because he's got kids, even when you don't know their preference? Do you assume anyone who has a date with him will be crushed to realise he has children?

As for the reaction article, I think this guy is full of good intention, but I found him very condescending towards women in a few points in his article, basically saying "I know these women think they think/want this, honey, but the truth is, these poor dears don't know and I know better than them. They're just brainwashed!"
Actually, it reminds me of how people deal with women in poly configurations. They often say the same kind of things. "I have to defend them because they don't realise they need to be defended!" Well fuck you, asshole.
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