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  #81  
Old 12-15-2012, 07:44 AM
riftara riftara is offline
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R's girl lost the baby. I'm grieving for the loss of my "nephew" and wondering what this means for R and his relationships with his girl and with me.
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  #82  
Old 12-23-2012, 11:21 PM
riftara riftara is offline
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Default Yule 2012

John and I decided to take a step back and focus on rebuilding our relationship. His anger issues were really starting to get to me an make me uncomfortable and generally sad.

So we decided I'd end things with V, so I invited him over, and he came with my yule present... a diamond watch from bulova and a diamond necklace.... John sent me a text telling me not to break up with him.

So we are going to try to make rebuilding us happen without ending things with V, because after a thoughtful gift "to remind me to make time for myself" that has such a large price tag, we couldn't end things now.
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  #83  
Old 12-28-2012, 04:41 AM
riftara riftara is offline
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John and I had a long talk.
We are still working on building us but we loosened our restrictions on each other and we are just taking it day by day.

He has been really good with controlling his anger, so things are looking up!
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  #84  
Old 12-29-2012, 06:00 AM
riftara riftara is offline
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Default Omg omg omg

So I just got off the phone with R.

He's going to come live with me for 6 months and try out a V with me and John.

His 6 months will start sometime between Feb and July depending on what his school does to him and when I can get out there to pick him up.

I'm so excited! And happy and I'm going nuts right now thinking about what this means and how we are going to make it work and so much on my mind, but I'm happy he said yes when I asked him to come out.

So now I have to figure out how to get him out here and when and so much other stuff, but we are going to have a real shot at this
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  #85  
Old 12-29-2012, 06:05 PM
riftara riftara is offline
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John and I had a long talk about R coming out here and us being a V and everything, and at first we argued, but then we settled down and actually had a conversation about it.

John wants to wait until August when he gets back from his school that he has to go to.

I'm ok with that, it gives us time to get use to the baby being here and save to move and find a place that will let us have our big dog. This town is very anti big dog in rentals.

It also allows my and R to hammer out our relationship without putting pressure on R in any way.

I think this is going to work out nicely. I'm excited!
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  #86  
Old 01-03-2013, 04:44 AM
riftara riftara is offline
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I feel like writing.

I talked to R about John's requirements some, and I'm going ot talk to him some more about it tonight. My goal is to not overwhelm him with restrictions or rules or even boundaries right now. There will be time to hammer out those things later.

John wants us out of this house, well thats not accurate, we can't live with R here, so we have to get out of this house, which we can't do until June, so we are going to pack everything up, go out to GA for a month and come back and find a place. All of us in a hotel room and the dog in a kennel will motivate me to find a place quick!

We have to save money - about $3000 I think, for the move. To cover hotel and down payments on the house and utilities. I'm going to save half our tax returns for that, and then some every month, which will be hard for me as I'm not a saver!

I've also got to have money for my mom to come out and help with the baby in April. And she wants to stop twice for hotel rooms instead of driving half way, so it will take her 3 days to get out here and $600 of my money. Twice. Since my dad wont pay half like he said he would a few months ago.

I'm kinda stressed about the money stuff since I just found out about my mom today and just after I spent another hundred on baby stuff. I know everything will be ok, but its still stressful for me.

I have to get serious about money stuffs, and get it ingrained in me. I think I'll talk to my counselor about it next week.

I also need to talk to her about R and R living out here and R and me having a relationship and what I need to do and how I should handle things. I love that our counselor is ok with us being poly. She sees how close we are and she really is amazed sometimes that it works for us, but she is never condescending or negative.

I'm giving back V's present to me. Not sure when, but I am, my counselor suggested it. She pointed out that it wasnt really appropriate for him to give me and it may have some hidden agenda or it may not but if it made me uncomfortable, then I should give it back.

I'm sick. Its really bothering me too. Hacking up my left lung (or is it my right) and feeling so much pain is getting to me.
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  #87  
Old 01-03-2013, 05:02 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Why give the watch back? He gave it to you, it's yours. You need money, sell it.
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  #88  
Old 01-03-2013, 05:04 AM
riftara riftara is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Why give the watch back? He gave it to you, it's yours. You need money, sell it.
the thought had crossed my mind.

I could likely get quite a bit for it.

It sitting on my sink with my other jewelry is stressing me out I know that.
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  #89  
Old 01-03-2013, 05:12 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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I had to sell some of my furniture this past year. No more couch! You do what you gotta do, if you need the cash.
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Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me. ~Bryan Ferry
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  #90  
Old 01-03-2013, 06:42 AM
riftara riftara is offline
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Default R says yes

So I told R that I needed assurance from him that him coming out here wasnt going to change at the drop of a hat, so I asked him to be my BF, long distance for now, so that if he changed his mind he could just break up with me and I wont feel the need to bug him about coming out here.

He said hes still working out the thing with his baby momma, but yes. I think he understands where I'm coming from at least.

So I'll update my siggy!
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