Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions

Notices

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
  #10  
Old 12-18-2012, 07:09 AM
Cleo Cleo is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Europe
Posts: 411
Default

maybe you would feel less like a tool if the situation was more about her, instead of about you... what I mean is, why would you be the one telling the guy he can play with her?
If she likes him, and wants to pursue something with him, she can ask you if you're ok with that. And you say sure honey, within boundaries such and such (and that could be anything from 'don't go to our favorite restaurant with him' to certain safer sex rules).
And then she tells the guy: I'm interested in you, and as you know I have a SO, but we're in an open / poly relationship so that's ok, and he's ok with it.

In the situation you describe it's more like you are giving him permission, and he takes it, and I could see how that could make you feel like he's taking advantage.
__________________
early forties, straight.
the guys: Ren - husband; Brig - very new bf; Knight - non-sexual bf; MrBrown - it's complicated
Ren's girls: Lou - gf of 2 years, Mon - very new gf


******************************

There are as many forms of love as there are moments in time. Jane Austen
Reply With Quote
 

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 09:19 AM.