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Old 12-07-2012, 04:59 AM
smokymtngirl85 smokymtngirl85 is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 14
Question Definitions needed. . . .

So i need some definitions and terms and being that I am not a person who favors labels i need some help because i do need to narrow it down to something so it makes it easier to explain to family. . .

We are going to be "coming out" to our families soon with the type of relationship that we have. The definition for Polyamory is so SO broad and we want to narrow it down to a more defined definition that fits us so it can better explain it to our family but i need some help with terminology & definitions so I can be prepared to explain when we started getting the 20 questions. I in NO way wanting family to get the impression that it is purely sexual or a relationship open to new partners. So here goes:

I am in a V relationship.

I am the hinge.

I am the person who identifies as poly. My partners each identify as monogamous. Both are okay with me being poly.

My husband (we are legally married) is monogamous and has no other partners; its just me. We have 3 kids.

My fiance (we are 100% committed and planning to have a wedding/handfasting soon) is monogamous and has no other partners; its just me. We want to have a child in the future.

My fiance & my husband are NOT partners. Just friends.

We will not be branching out of this V. There will be no new or additional partners at any time.

As we grow more committed and i will by "married" to both partners by 2014, we share decisions, children, money, etc.

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That being said, I think we fit better into the Polyfaithful group, which can also be referred to as Polyexclusive or Polyfidelity (which isnt recommended as a term because it can be misinterpreted due to the fidelity part of the word)? Or do the 3 have different definitions?

We are also moving towards being completely Polytrothic: "Polytrothic relationships are characterized by equal participation by all partners in major life decisions such as those regarding livelihood, children and property."

So would I be correct to say "We believe are Polyfaithful while practicing Polytrothism?"

And if so would it be correct to say (im paraphrasing definitions i've read):

"We are in a Polyfaithful relationship which, like monogamous relationships, are closed in the sense that partners agree not to be sexual outside the V that is our relationship. But within our V, we practice polytrothism which means that equal participation is given to all partners in major life decisions such as those regarding livelihood, children and property"

Am i correct? Any feedback? I've been doing a lot of research but my head is just swimming lol

Thanks!!!!!!!!
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polyandry, polyfidelitous, polyfidelity

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