Trains, Planes and Polymobiles
Well, I thought it was time I started my own little blog here, peppered with a little Sinatra mood music It will give me something to do when I am not out chasing skirt. Which means I'll have absolutely no time to post, whatsoever, obviously. ~grins~
Actually, at the moment, I am taking a mildly-Eat-Pray-Love-esque voyage of self-discovery, on a self-induced poly ban. Three weeks in and I hear those wicked demons tempting me... "Log onto OK Cupid... sparklepop.... we know you can hear ussssss...."
But, alas. I am strong! I shall not surrender to them! The fiends!
When I was 17... it was a very good year... it was a very good year... for small town girls...*
* Do feel quite free to skip my life history and just wait for a more interesting angst-laden bitchfest about poly life, or some such...
Polyamory was a term that I stumbled upon through the omniscient brain that is Google. Before that, I simply considered it as being 'open' and did not give it a great deal of thought.
When I was 13, I had decided to tell an acquaintance at school that I liked girls. This would have been around the summer of 1998. Wow. Retro. By the end of the afternoon, all the other 13 year olds in my school heard the news; which was apparently the hottest gossip our school had encountered since Mr and Mrs Evans, the Geography and English teachers, were found fucking in the storecupboard in the 1970's.
I vividly remember walking across the large playground, about 5 days after the Breaking News - teenagers parting the way and following me with questions as if I was the anti-Jesus on the Red Sea. One day, when I was 16, I sat on a bus, on the way to a Theatre trip with my English class. I was instantly drawn to a girl who got on last and asked my friends who she was. She was their English teacher. 26, in fact, and definitely not a 'girl'. ~insert Machiavellian voice~ I had to make her mine....
A few months later, that straight, engaged, mother-of-one, 26 year old female English teacher became my lover for the next two years. And my first love. Ahh... and my first heartbreak, when she married the fiance. Strangely, I had never wanted her to leave him for me - I had only wanted her to be honest with him. Maybe this was a first, misguided, hint of poly tendencies?
As that relationship was ending, I met a man... and at the tender age of almost 18 began my ten-year-stint of serial, overlapping, longterm monogamy.
It was also the age that I discovered a belief in Karma.
Yes... what goes around comes around. My Teacher Love had cheated on her fiance with me and the man I met ended up cheating on me. Somehow, I knew he would, before he ever did. At the start of my relationship with him, I had one last afternoon with my Teacher Love and sort of... unintentionally... became A Cheater - dashing what would have gone on to be a perfectly clean record, because she was crying and I felt bad... and the only thing I could do to offer comfort was to sleep with her. That was when I decided that I would never, ever be involved in any kind of cheating, ever again... because, you know, it only comes back to teach you a lesson, kids....
me: female, 29
GF: my primary girlfriend, 39
3 year, open poly V, long distance