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  #11  
Old 11-27-2012, 06:19 AM
riftara riftara is offline
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I just wanted to say that we are also on FetLife and poly. John and I have been poly for over 5 years now and have gone though a handfull of SO's, please dont think that this cant work, as long s everyone consents and things are good for you all, there is no reason that Kink and Poly cant live together
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  #12  
Old 11-27-2012, 03:21 PM
Kihluna Kihluna is offline
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Thank you everyone, I needed to hear those things. His issue with Poly, along with all that he sent me to, is that they "tried it and it didnt work out". I haven`t met any other Poly people in my area because they don`t come to functions or maybe I just don`t know what to look for
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  #13  
Old 11-27-2012, 03:38 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kihluna View Post
Thank you everyone, I needed to hear those things. His issue with Poly, along with all that he sent me to, is that they "tried it and it didnt work out". I haven`t met any other Poly people in my area because they don`t come to functions or maybe I just don`t know what to look for
OK, so every time a monogamous relationship breaks up, that proves monogamy "doesn't work"? Or should we all just give up on relationships in general, because people break up, so that must mean "nothing works".

PUHLEASE.

Oh, and get this - people have been around WAAAAAY longer than Fetlife. Just because someone goes on Fetlife and says something does not make it fucking so. That goes on on this forum too. I can't tell you how many times I've seen people write shit like, "I thought I was poly, but you guys are a bunch of nazi assholes, so poly is not for me." (That's from the other side.) That would be like you saying, "You people on Fetlife are narrow-minded control-freaks, therefore BDSM is not for me."

I'm just saying - HELLO LOL.
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  #14  
Old 11-27-2012, 04:24 PM
Kihluna Kihluna is offline
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Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
OK, so every time a monogamous relationship breaks up, that proves monogamy "doesn't work"? Or should we all just give up on relationships in general, because people break up, so that must mean "nothing works".

PUHLEASE.

Oh, and get this - people have been around WAAAAAY longer than Fetlife. Just because someone goes on Fetlife and says something does not make it fucking so. That goes on on this forum too. I can't tell you how many times I've seen people write shit like, "I thought I was poly, but you guys are a bunch of nazi assholes, so poly is not for me." (That's from the other side.) That would be like you saying, "You people on Fetlife are narrow-minded control-freaks, therefore BDSM is not for me."

I'm just saying - HELLO LOL.



I am not saying I base my life around fetlife. In my area I know of only a few people, and this guy was one of the only ones who invited us over (before josh) and we got to know him and his submissive and it was a very nice learning experience. He is active in our community so I would think that his opinion means alot to the older generation of kinky people around here.
As I have the baby and both boys work, I don`t get out much so I only know a total of 4 people in the lifestyle. 3 of which are active in TNG but TNG meets mostly in naples and does awesome events that I just can`t ever find a babysitter for. This guy was kinda like a mentor to me, and I was really hurt that he reacted that way. and up until now Fetlife was kinda like my only portal into the Lifestyle.
Even a friend in Orlando won`t talk to me because she thinks my situation is stupid
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  #15  
Old 11-27-2012, 04:56 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kihluna View Post
This guy was kinda like a mentor to me, and I was really hurt that he reacted that way. and up until now Fetlife was kinda like my only portal into the Lifestyle.
Even a friend in Orlando won`t talk to me because she thinks my situation is stupid
I can certainly understand the feeling of betrayal of trust that you got from this person as your "mentor". But please don't consider this representative of the general population of Fetlife, or the general population of "alternative lifestyles" or whatever you want to call it. The sarcastic tone of my posts here in this thread is directed at this erstwhile mentor, not at yourself.

As to the friend in Orlando - it sounds like she's doing you a favor not talking to you. You don't need that crap. This is a great way to find out who your friends really are, is it not?
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  #16  
Old 11-27-2012, 05:12 PM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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If you want to still use Fet search for a poly group on there. I know there generally are local poly groups.

There's a Florida Poly group with 781 members
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  #17  
Old 11-27-2012, 05:26 PM
Kihluna Kihluna is offline
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I have looked into the Poly groups on fetlife. I`m still debating on joining one, they seem to be mainly just people looking for other people. this forum has a nice wide range of topics instead of just looking for people to add to the group.

I would also like to learn more about Poly, where it comes from, the purpose, why it is resented in soiciety..etc. Any good books or articles on the subject?
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  #18  
Old 11-27-2012, 05:35 PM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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Opening Up is a very good one to use as a starting point.
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Merry: Tig's wife/slave
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Pet: Umbra's slave/wife, Elle girlfriend
Domo: Pet's submissive
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  #19  
Old 11-28-2012, 03:22 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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There is a member here, username is clairegoad, who lives on the west coast of in Florida. She has often posted about a very strong, active poly community in Tampa: http://www.polytampa.com/

She also mentioned that there is a poly-kink crossover group in Florida called "Bound to Love," which meets regularly, and they are on FetLife: https://fetlife.com/groups/13933

Hope this is helpful!
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  #20  
Old 11-28-2012, 06:52 AM
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DarayTala DarayTala is offline
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I just want to say I'm sorry for what you had to go through with your friend. It is not okay for someone to pass judgement on your relationship, especially when it is unwanted. It sounds like you have a very healthy poly relationship and are doing wonderfully for yourself. I understand its hard to be confident when others keep telling your it will fail, but just hold your head up high and watch as they have nothing left to say as your relationship stands the test of time, or you grow and become a better person through it. I know when my fiance and I first started dating and were open as poly, many people said it could never work. They even assumed we weren't poly anymore a couple years later, because things were going so well, and upon finding out we'd be involved with someone else all that time, had to face that it could work.

Also, I'm sorry you had this experience through fetlife. I've always found it to be a open and welcoming community for poly folk. I would recommend checking out the groups Poly and Kinky, Polyamory, and Practical Polyamory. I'm sure as people have said you may find some great local groups as well. I hope you have the best of luck!
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