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Old 11-27-2012, 03:47 PM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 398
Default Broaching the sex topic

I'm putting this here in the hopes that someone has some sort of advice on what to give me. Woodsmith and I haven't really had much sex in about a year now and I don't know how to get past my mental hang ups or figure out what his might be.

Last October my depression came back full force (I had been off medication for 6 years without symptoms). Ended up back on medication and in therapy because I knew I needed it. Woodsmith had a lot of difficulty coping with what was happening to me and even when I would reach out to cuddle or be affectionate he would pull away. It got to a point that the only times he tried to touch me was when he wanted sex and because I wasn't feeling cared for I would pretty much always turn it down.

I know some of my issues probably stem a bit from what happened then (from October till July when I was finally put on the right medication).

So my issues: 1) I can't get in the mood with him. I'm still attracted to him and mentally I do want to be intimate with him but I can't physically get in the mood. 2) A continuance of that, whenever we do get intimate it hurts a lot.

His issue (as far as I can see): Timing. Times when we both can be alone he kinda avoids any intimate time. He doesn't join me when I go to bed during the week because I need to be in bed by midnight to get enough sleep for work and he likes staying up till 3 or 4 in the morning. So any time he does try to initiate sex ends up happening 5 to 10 minutes before we have to leave to go somewhere (which has been knowledge for at least a week). I've pointed this out to him in the past and he doesn't do anything to change it.
Cattiva: Me
Woodsmith: My husband
Tighearn: boyfriend/dom
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
N8: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: N8 girlfriend
Ruby: Part of the Leather Family
Logan: Leather Sir in the Family
Arc: Logan's boy
Holly: Leather family
K: Holly's sub
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