Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions

Notices

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
  #1  
Old 11-20-2012, 05:48 PM
Witch Witch is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 19
Default Realized Where My Jealousy Comes From

So I made a little break through just now. My husband and I are in a somewhat open relationship. I say somewhat only because we're not open about it publicly. I feel like I am more "warmed up to" poly then my husband is, and as such we are taking it slow. Honestly I get very excited when I think my husband may have an interest. I don't know why, I just do. However, when a woman comes on to my husband I get very jealous. I always beat myself up over it because I think to myself WHY? Why do I feel this way.

BUT! I found out why. It's because we're not public about it that gets me jealous. It's because those other women do not realize we're open. I realized my jealousy stems from the feelings of disrespect that the woman in question is placing upon my husband and me. Its obvious we are married, ring and everything. And its posted on whatever social networking site we're on, and its usually over the internet that it happens. Maybe its cause its on the internet that lets these women feel no fear or shame when hitting on a married man. That just makes me more irritated, cause now I feel like they are cowardly as well. Why are you going to hit on a married man that appears to be in a happy monogamous relationship?

You may ask, you're in an open relationship, so why does it matter? I knooooow... Maybe I'm being a bit hypocritical, but if we were more public about it, and THEN someone hit on my husband I'd feel much much less territorial. When we decided we were going to be open, whenever he tried to court a lady, I felt no jealousy at all, I felt excitement and happiness. I feel that if were public about it, i think the same feelings would reign true for other people coming on to him. X3

Am I wrong for feeling this way? How do I deal with it without going public? Uggh lol
Reply With Quote
 

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 04:02 AM.