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  #11  
Old 11-03-2012, 04:31 AM
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I'm getting whiplash. So it turns out my SO sent a private message to Pina, at the outset of our communications with Pina. Something that Pina did not reveal to me until this morning. Apparently the PM mentions how my SO is really not into this, but she's only doing it because she loves me, she likes to have sex with girls, but living with one will be new for her, and she's not sure if it will work for her.

Well that was enough "insecurity" alerts to cause Pina to be not ok with my SO. So now it looks like it's shaping up to choosing. And if I must choose I will choose Pina, who is open to a multi-relationship, and my lifestyle.

This is pretty much the third strike for my SO. I told her to stop broadcasting insecurity and personal philosophy to "applicants", but she seems to just not be able to help it. I will have a long talk with her, and lay down the law and find out if she will be capable of leading my lifestyle, or not, and then it's time for her to make her choice.

In the meantime, I went on two dates today, to take my mind off things, and SUPPOSEDLY my SO is bringing home either a guy, or a girl, or both, to have some fun tonight. The guy is a casual friend, so it'll be cool to try that, since my main gig is multiple women. But I must be fair
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  #12  
Old 11-03-2012, 12:55 PM
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CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
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Can't say I'm surprised at the issues with the family not agreeing - if you remember it was something I mentioned quite a while ago - independent people are the best, if they are going to be "out" to their families and their families may not agree - otherwise you are risking the visit from the father with the shotgun.

I'm not surprised at what your partner (and mother of your child, as I understand it) is doing - she has always voiced this opinion to you - sounds like she has tried telling you but doesn't feel that you have listened, so instead she is being open an honest with the folks that you are considering dating.

I think that the two of you should definitely sort out what the two of you want so that you can both get on with your lives, whatever those lives may look like...
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  #13  
Old 11-03-2012, 09:04 PM
Vinccenzo Vinccenzo is offline
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Is it just your GF who is not allowed a personal philosophy or the right to communicate insecurities to intended sex partners or does this apply to applicants as well?
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  #14  
Old 11-04-2012, 05:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vinccenzo View Post
Is it just your GF who is not allowed a personal philosophy or the right to communicate insecurities to intended sex partners or does this apply to applicants as well?
She's allowed, everyone is allowed, but part of her trying this lifestyle, is also attempting to wear a new cloak of beliefs, and one of those cloaks is not to be saying to the other's involved that she doesn't like this lifestyle. I mean that is pretty obvious. She's striking out.
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Old 11-04-2012, 05:42 PM
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There's some things you just don't need to say if you are adopting a certain lifestyle. You don't tell someone "I want to marry you, but your nose is ugly." You tolerate the things that aren't perfect because you don't need to broadcast any insecurity about anything you think you can handle and that would make the other person uncomfortable with feeling secure with you.
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Last edited by PolyPhonic; 11-04-2012 at 05:46 PM.
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  #16  
Old 11-05-2012, 11:09 PM
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You know what, I've got an even better analogy. It's like you hate working, but you need money, so you say to yourself, "Ok, I will try to get a job." So you go to the job interview and you tell him: "You know, in my heart, I am begging that you don't give me the job. I hate working, I prefer to stay at home." Even if on the remote chance that the hiring employer is desperate enough to hire you, they are always going to remember that you "hate working" and could just become obstinate at any time.

If you are trying something, there are some things you DO NOT SAY.
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