Your most recent OKC messages. post em here!

[Xared]

Originally Posted by Emm

If you are interested in people from that narrow segment of the population, why not? It helps to weed out people who aren't going to get your jokes.

If I weeded out everyone that didn't get my jokes, there probably wouldn't be anyone left.

Originally Posted by Helo

The match percentages are, I've found, extremely poor indicators of how well you'll get along with someone. Especially considering how many questions they answer and you answer make a big difference in the percentages.

According to the graph thing based on my answers to questions, it says I'm very aggressive and have a lot of sexual experience. I'm a smart ass and occasionally cocky, but I am not aggressive. As for lots of sexual experience, HA!

Even if compatibility could be scientifically determined, the questions wouldn't be a good way to go about it. I'll spare everyone the tl;dr scientific analysis and just say: It may be a good way to get conversations started, but is good for little else.

[Anek]

For sure match alone is not enough. I've found though that any match below 60% usually indicates we disagree on most of my (or their) "mandatory answers". Sure, we could have a chat... but why, if we're going to disagree at such basic levels?

I usually don't even look at the profiles of matches below 60%, rarely respond below 70%, and rarely meet below 80%. My partners and I have a 99% match, there's a reason for it. I've tried several times, and it never worked out. Since time is limited, I just focus on the good ones.

[Magdlyn]

Yeah, I met miss pixi and Ginger on okc, and we are all 95% or more matches with each other. I haven't had much luck with people below 85% match.

I'll have been with miss p 4 yrs come January and with Ginger one year in the same month... so I do think the okc matching system works quite well!

[Somegeezer]

Originally Posted by Helo

The match percentages are, I've found, extremely poor indicators of how well you'll get along with someone. Especially considering how many questions they answer and you answer make a big difference in the percentages.

I've found the numbers to actually be fairly representative. The one you really want to look at, is the friend percentage. That one seems to give the most clear indication to me. The match percentage is often higher than expected.

Originally Posted by Magdlyn

Yeah, I met miss pixi and Ginger on okc, and we are all 95% or more matches with each other. I haven't had much luck with people below 85% match.

I'll have been with miss p 4 yrs come January and with Ginger one year in the same month... so I do think the okc matching system works quite well!

Same here. Anything lower than 70%, I feel isn't worth even talking to. Anything above 85% generally has a lot of great points that hit me in the face.

Strangely, I've recently been getting some really great matches, who had some interesting profiles and great answers [and explanations] to questions. But they're at a point where they are so good, I feel intimadated to even send a message myself. >.< I hate being the one to initiate conversation. =P

[MusicalRose]

I've actually noticed recently that I get quite a few people asking me what poly is and wanting to know more about it. It is pretty encouraging for the most part. :-)

[Tang]

unfortunately I have a lot of things going against me. One, I cant seem to find any Poly's in my area on OKC. Two, the ones I do find are so far away that it would constitute 'going away for the weekend' trip. Three, I work in IT, I am use to doing something and getting instant results, good bad or indifferent.

so being in a long term getting to know each other without being able to be with each other ( be face to face), is really, really hard for me. but I'm trying. and the fact my car broke down last week doesn't help anything.

my last message on OKC was: "I guess its something you have to be into to understand." when me and someone actually local to me were talking about poly.

[jndmoore]

The other day I got one and all it said was "You want to eat me?" His only picture was him in just briefs that were pretty apparently stuffed. I really wonder if any woman ever goes for these guys, surely they have to have some luck with their sleazy messages or they wouldn't continue.

[SchrodingersCat]

Originally Posted by Some guy on OKC

You seem like a wonderful young lady, and I would love to talk sometime, maybe become friends. I hope all is well, and to hear from you soon. Be safe. Be happy.

His profile said he was looking for single girls. Admittedly it included "friendship" so I'll assume that's why he contacted a person who's non-single-two-fold.

So I responded:

Originally Posted by Me

Have you ever heard of polyamory? What do you think of it?

Response:

Originally Posted by Some guy on OKC

Yes I certainly have. Poly, from the Greek, meaning many. And amor, from the Latin, meaning love. I personally am extremely open to the endless possibilities of everything.

First, I love how he starts with a definition of the word's roots. $10 says he Googled that on the spot. I know what the word means, or I wouldn't be asking about it. Duh. Then he went into some diatribe about how it would never work, given "human nature" and how humanity is inherently dishonest and people are prone to jealousy. So cynical, makes me wonder why he bothers dating at all? Who wants to date jealous liars even if they're monogamous?? So in what sense is that being "extremely open to the endless possibilities of everything?" Sounds more like he's made up his mind against it.

I also find it extremely amusing that he mentioned in his profile that he went to a "Prestigious Top Ranked Prep School." Like, the first thing "about" him besides location. Pretentious much?

[Cleo]

Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat

Originally Posted by Some guy on OKC You seem like a wonderful young lady, and I would love to talk sometime, maybe become friends. I hope all is well, and to hear from you soon. Be safe. Be happy.

You know, I am so intrigued by how one single sentence in a message from a stranger can rub me either completeley the right or the wrong way. This line you quoted? wrong, wrong, wrong, and I can't even really explain why. Probably the 'be safe, be happy'' part is what irks me the most. But it's really more a gut feeling than something specific, because there is nothing really wrong with this line is there?

So far, every single time I did not listen to my gut feeling, and respondend positively to a message that my gut said was 'wrong', the follow up email conversation confirmed that gut feeling. Very fascinating.

[MeeraReed]

Originally Posted by Cleo

You know, I am so intrigued by how one single sentence in a message from a stranger can rub me either completeley the right or the wrong way. This line you quoted? wrong, wrong, wrong, and I can't even really explain why. Probably the 'be safe, be happy'' part is what irks me the most. But it's really more a gut feeling than something specific, because there is nothing really wrong with this line is there?

So far, every single time I did not listen to my gut feeling, and respondend positively to a message that my gut said was 'wrong', the follow up email conversation confirmed that gut feeling. Very fascinating.

Funny! I was thinking the same thing about the "be safe, be happy" making me feel really creepy somehow. Can't even articulate why.

Maybe it's him calling her a "young lady" too. Ick.

I feel guilty when I don't respond to messages based on a gut feeling of "wrongness" when there is nothing concretely wrong with the words--but it turns out my instincts are usually right.

I feel like the guy who just says "Want to eat me?!" is more honest and less manipulative than the guy who says "Be safe. Be happy." But why?

Maybe because the latter guy is already implying too much intimacy with the "young lady" he's messaging. It's not his business to admonish her to be safe or wish her to be happy. His phrasing of the message sounds too forced and too formal, too careful somehow.

Although I can see what a struggle it is to figure out how to word a message so that one doesn't sound creepy!