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  #21  
Old 10-26-2012, 02:59 AM
SkylerSquirrel SkylerSquirrel is offline
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Quote:
I feel that even if I was to say either of those no one would care to try and provide me with things.
Well, you won't know unless you tell it to them clearly. Including the part where you feel like no one cares about what you want.

Then at least you will know for sure whether or not your people care about you, and you can make your next decision based on that.

(I myself need to take my own advice here.)
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Independent polyperson seeking friendships, in which physical intimacy may or may not develop.

I do not wish to attach to any particular person. My love knows no limits.

Last edited by SkylerSquirrel; 10-26-2012 at 03:00 AM. Reason: phrasing
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  #22  
Old 10-26-2012, 03:50 AM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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And I think I may have just destroyed one of my relationships.

I wasn't paying attention to who was around while I was talking to Woodsmith about what I was hurting so much from. Started rambling because I'm hurting and said (in pain and anger) that I just wish Peaseblossum would die.

90% of the history of having things pushed aside has been Primal pushing aside for her. I mean he treats her better than he treats Lamian even.

Primal was sitting near by. I was in such tunnel vision I didn't notice.

I think all he heard was me wishing she was dead.

Wandered off to talk to Lamian about something, has come back, and won't even acknowledge me.

I can't live here if this is the case.
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Cattiva: Me
Woodsmith: My husband
Tighearn: boyfriend/dom
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
NT: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: NT and Merry girlfriend
Umbra: Elle's Dom
Pet: Umbra's slave/wife, Elle girlfriend
Domo: Pet's submissive
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  #23  
Old 10-27-2012, 02:33 AM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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Discovered limits I need to set.

Also need to know if this sounds ok (in a pm is fine).

I've been feeling hurt and neglected lately. And if things continue down this way then I will need to end things but because of how much I love you this would mean moving out and removing myself from any thing I would see you at until I heal. Not because we broke up but because we did so without any feelings changing.

Here's what I need. If peaseblossum needs to call you after 10, unless it's an emergency please keep the conversation under a half hour.
More importantly, if we make plans, even if it's just to work out don't cancel them on me for someone else or put me in the position of deciding whether I see you or she does.
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Cattiva: Me
Woodsmith: My husband
Tighearn: boyfriend/dom
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
NT: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: NT and Merry girlfriend
Umbra: Elle's Dom
Pet: Umbra's slave/wife, Elle girlfriend
Domo: Pet's submissive
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  #24  
Old 10-27-2012, 03:09 AM
SkylerSquirrel SkylerSquirrel is offline
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That sounds pretty straightforward.
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Independent polyperson seeking friendships, in which physical intimacy may or may not develop.

I do not wish to attach to any particular person. My love knows no limits.
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  #25  
Old 10-27-2012, 04:21 AM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SkylerSquirrel View Post
That sounds pretty straightforward.
It doesn't sound ultimatium-like does it? Cause I don't want to have it sound like that.

It's so strange how just simple wording can take the same request from a request/need to an ultimatium.
__________________
Cattiva: Me
Woodsmith: My husband
Tighearn: boyfriend/dom
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
NT: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: NT and Merry girlfriend
Umbra: Elle's Dom
Pet: Umbra's slave/wife, Elle girlfriend
Domo: Pet's submissive
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  #26  
Old 10-28-2012, 08:17 PM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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Doing much better. I got to talk with Primal about a minor issue that's been hurting (I want to save the bigger issues for when we have our family session with a therapist so we have the mediator).

We're going to change our day together away from the day of the D&D game. It started as that because I was only down in his area on Thursdays for game. But we really don't have any time to actually spend together.

We are also going to make up the 3 weeks we've lost this month. Once was because Lamian had to go the dentist the next morning to have some teeth pulled and she was in too much pain to sleep on the couch. The next was because he was talking to Peaseblossum at 11:30 at night after game and still had to pack for his weekend with her when he got off the phone with her at 12:30. And the last one was a mix of my breakdown but also he wanted to make it easier for Peaseblossum to get sleep before having to get up at 4:30 for work.

So we still need to figure out when we want to change the day to and get out make-up days figured out but it's going to be taken care of.
__________________
Cattiva: Me
Woodsmith: My husband
Tighearn: boyfriend/dom
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
NT: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: NT and Merry girlfriend
Umbra: Elle's Dom
Pet: Umbra's slave/wife, Elle girlfriend
Domo: Pet's submissive
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  #27  
Old 10-29-2012, 05:28 PM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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Realized another thing I need to bring up when we have our family session (and they ALL do this).

Sometimes I'll send out texts (whether individual or group) that either have a question or a thought that is important. And I'll never get a reply until i see them (which could be a day or two depending on plans). So I would like to have at the very least some sort of message acknowleding that they got the text and will talk to me about it when they see me next.

I don't trust technology all the time so it's just a reasurrance for me that the message didn't get lost in the electrical webs.
__________________
Cattiva: Me
Woodsmith: My husband
Tighearn: boyfriend/dom
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
NT: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: NT and Merry girlfriend
Umbra: Elle's Dom
Pet: Umbra's slave/wife, Elle girlfriend
Domo: Pet's submissive
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  #28  
Old 11-06-2012, 03:23 PM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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So I realized I may need to ask for some reasurance today.

Some background:

Primal and I used to have our night on Thursdays. In October we lost our night three times (once because of Lamian and twice because of Peaseblossum). Because Thursday is also D&D game night we decided to move our day to Sundays so we actually have some time where it can just be us (as opposed to only getting maybe a half hour together after big social time). We also planned to spend this weekend coming up together to make up the time we lost.

Peaseblossum's mom is out of town right now due to a death in the family and told Peaseblossum she has to take care of her grandmother and the dog. Peaseblossum's mom is very against her relationship with Primal and has stated he's not allowed in her house (also he used public transportation which would not get him from her mother's house to work). He's been trying to convince her to go home tonight so they can have the time together.

Sunday she was stating that she wouldn't be able to be home because that would mean there'd be a 24 hour period the dog would be alone and threw a fit when he refused to go and spend that day with her because it was going to be our day.

Now I need the reassurance because on Saturday she made a comment about taking him home with her this coming Saturday (It's Darkeye's birthday and Lamian was joking that Primal can't have the 12 girls that are invited over because it's not his birthday) and now I know she's going to want to guilt him into spending the whole weekend with her because she didn't get to see him this week.

He gave me some reassurance on Saturday when she made the comment because he noticed I got visibly upset by it and let me know that wasn't going to happen because he promised it with me. But now my head is spiraling on me and needs to just hear that again.
__________________
Cattiva: Me
Woodsmith: My husband
Tighearn: boyfriend/dom
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
NT: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: NT and Merry girlfriend
Umbra: Elle's Dom
Pet: Umbra's slave/wife, Elle girlfriend
Domo: Pet's submissive
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  #29  
Old 11-07-2012, 03:49 PM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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You know, I really wish I had someone at my work I trusted to fill in on my relationship stuff.

It sucks having things happen that make me giddy that aren't done by Woodsmith and not being able to share them because I'd be looked at strange (and possibly lose my job since I work with kids and OMG, that would make me a deviant).
__________________
Cattiva: Me
Woodsmith: My husband
Tighearn: boyfriend/dom
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
NT: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: NT and Merry girlfriend
Umbra: Elle's Dom
Pet: Umbra's slave/wife, Elle girlfriend
Domo: Pet's submissive
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  #30  
Old 11-08-2012, 02:50 PM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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In therapy yesterday I came to the realization that I want Peaseblossum to show my relationship with Primal the same respect I show for hers. As in don't throw a fit if he says he can't do something with you because we already have plans, don't constantly call/text him even if he doesn't answer while we're doing something.
__________________
Cattiva: Me
Woodsmith: My husband
Tighearn: boyfriend/dom
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
NT: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: NT and Merry girlfriend
Umbra: Elle's Dom
Pet: Umbra's slave/wife, Elle girlfriend
Domo: Pet's submissive
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