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Old 12-17-2009, 09:41 PM
glowinthedarkstars glowinthedarkstars is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Somewhere under the rainbow
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GroundedSpirit View Post
Hi Glow,

Yea - I think you're tangled up a bit in terminology and confused yourself. Your BF it might appear is as confused or more-so than you
Unfortunately the root term "poly" has been grabbed as a shortcut by all sorts of people and in some cases I'm going to say it's been adopted for convenience sake/justification. "Poly" meaning basically "multiple" that's an easy grab.
The "amour" got left off. The loving part. That's not as easy & convenient - ya think ? That means commitment. And lots more.
Let's face it. In the early days, when you are just starting dating etc, just experimenting with your sexuality, there's lots of "poly" happening and not a lot of "amour" That's perfectly fine. Just don't confuse the reality. At some point some people come face-to-face with a situation where the "poly-amour" jumps up and confronts you. Sex may or may not even be part of it ! But regardless, because of this culture, it's often viewed as a threat. Something hard & difficult. Something to be avoided.
Some of us view it differently. Some chose to embrace & celebrate it. You'll know in your heart what feels "right" when the time comes. But at least you have the advantage of a head start because you've discovered it prior to it happening and slapping you in the head unexpectedly. If you keep asking & learning you'll be better prepared when the time comes.

GS

so so so true thanks for the insight. I dont view slut to be negative by any means it is just something that I have never experienced my self. I dont think its to be avoided exactly, but from a personal standpoint....for example going out to meet with a group of people I dont know is kind of scary to me, and mildly threatening even because of my anxiety. I know there is nothing wrong with it, and people do it every day, most people are proud of thier social skills. others might consider someone who is super confident and socialiable to be "cocky". Same thing...i think... maybe?
okay im really not all too sure.
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