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  #301  
Old 09-12-2012, 01:23 AM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Congrats!

GG
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  #302  
Old 09-12-2012, 01:39 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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Thanks. I'm excited. I know its silly, months to go. But, still excited. Lol!
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  #303  
Old 09-14-2012, 06:53 AM
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This cold is kicking my ass! I gargled salt water before bed. Nasty! But it did seem to help a bit with the sore throat.
My bro is having a heartbreaking time right now. Their marriage has been rocky for some time. But, it looks like they may have reached the final cliff. I don't know. I try to stay out of it. But, he's my baby brother. It's hard to watch.
On a good note, my statistics classes are going well so far as is my weight training class.
Two days til maca comes home. I'm looking forward to seeing him and my Sweet Pea again! Sweet Pea got two Spruce Hens today for their dinner. Everyone has been very impressed with him at hunting camp. He's been helpful and on the ball all week. I am honestly not surprised, he really is an amazing kid. But, I am very proud of him. This is the first time they have allowed Anyone under 16. So it was a big deal and he has proven himself worthy of them taking the chance on him. He's invited to go again next year. (he's 12)
Except being sick-life is good. Sour Pea has been getting her chore routine down and working on school too. I watched October Baby last night and cried my eyes out. GG has been taking care of me and keeping me hydrated and fed.
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  #304  
Old 09-17-2012, 10:19 AM
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MrFarFromRight MrFarFromRight is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DC7783 View Post
How do I know if anyone is online? I'm all new at this....
Another way to see if a particular person is on-line: there's a circle at the right of our user names (at head of each post and elsewhere). If it's green, that person is on-line. [sending this as PM, but posting it here for any other newbies]
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If I can't dance, I want no part in your Revolution.
- Emma Goldman Anarchist and Polyamorous par excellence
The person who says something is impossible should not interrupt the person who is doing it.
- old Chinese proverb
And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
~ Anais Nin
I'd rather have a broken heart / Than have a heart of stone.
- from "Boundless Love (A Polyamory Song)" by Jimmy Hollis i Dickson
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  #305  
Old 09-19-2012, 02:28 AM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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Originally Posted by LovingRadiance View Post
Lol! I just got the call, I'm going to be a grammy again! it's still secret, so I can't share on fb or with the family. But, I had to tell someone, so you guys get the news first.
Congrats and good luck to the mommy!
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Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

There's no lying in polyamory!

I'm a 58 year old woman with 2 partners:
miss pixi, my live-in gf, 36 (together since Jan '09)
Ginger, bf, 61, married, lives nearby (together since Jan '12)
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  #306  
Old 09-20-2012, 05:07 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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We watched 'The Lucky One' tonight as a family. It was an emotional movie, but a nice, relaxing and mellow evening.
Our weather is a bit insane at the moment. Didn't know Alaska had a monsoon season, been here 34 years, never seen anything like it. But, I suppose there is a first for everything!
Sour Pea went to tears, inconsolable sobbing when GG left for work (he takes 'lunch' between 7-9 pm to do the bedtime routine with her). Maca is curled up in her bed now reading her a story, but it was an impressive emotional breakdown. The whole of her hysteria, combined with our unreal and unusual weather got my heart ticking with nerves. I trxted him to drive safe tonight and to let me know when he was home safe. I don't usually hear him when he comes home, he sneaks in quiet as a mouse around 2am.
Now, off to dreams for me. Tomorrow, statistics homework!
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  #307  
Old 09-23-2012, 02:27 AM
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I worked to process my feelings today-I'm not done. But, here are some of the thoughts.

In my world, if a person wants a “restart” on our relationship after they have harmed me (regardless of circumstance), the following steps are necessary:

request a restart
acknowledge the harm you did to me
make amends for the harm (depending on circumstance they may be simple or complicated)
respect the current limitation of my trust
take concrete actions to show me the situation has changed, in order to built trust
not play avoidy games
not play 3rd party communication-communicate clearly and directly to me
accept that restart comes with limited privileges due to breach of trust
Finally, accept and understand that at no point, ever, does your closeness with someone else in my life automatically extend to you the privileges I extend to people I am personally close to. You can not ever get those privileges without doing the work to get to know me personally and build a trusting relationship with me personally.
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  #308  
Old 09-23-2012, 02:28 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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Default Expectations of Metamours-unfinished

I expect metamours to

respect our boundaries
communicate directly to me on issues regarding me
treat my children with kindness and respect
never talk bad about myself, GG or Maca in front of our children
respect my personal space
treat me kindly
not talk negatively about me behind my back
consider the consequences of their actions upon me
consider the consequences of their actions on M & I's relationship
consider the consequences of their words upon me
consider the consequences of their words upon M & I's relationship
consider the consequences of their actions on GG
consider the consequences of their actions on our children
consider the consequences of their words on GG
consider the consequences of their words on our children
NOT discipline my children
NOT undermine my, GG or Maca's authority with our children
NOT attempt to get in the middle of any of my other relationships
NOT attempt to undermine any of my other relationships
NOT treat me or my relationships with disdain
Be understanding of the limitations on our time for social activities


*every one of these is also an expectation I have for my friends and for Maca and GG's friends.
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  #309  
Old 09-25-2012, 07:05 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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Having opened up the darker secrets of my submissiveness has created a much more significant Vulnerability in me, regarding Maca.

I was explaining the other day;
If Friendship is a risk base of 10 points
Romantic gestures added=+5pts
Sex added=+20
Commitment=+10
Marriage=+20
Submission=+20H
Kids=+50 per kid
Buying a home=+20
Etc. so with each addt'l sharing, the risk goes up and thus your POTENTIAL DAMAGE increases too.
So when assessing the relationship against itself, it can increase risk and thus your vulnerability with each of these (and there are others) added dynamics to any relationship.......
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  #310  
Old 09-25-2012, 11:25 PM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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Sigh...

Unrelated to Poly,
my godson, SplitPea, disappeared.... Christmas will be 2 years I think. Anyway, In May he reached out to me via facebook.
He beat around the bush for 1/2 hour via instant messenger then asked "where do we stand".
It was his mom who took him-and dumped him with his paternal grandparents for a year before finally arranging for him to go live with her (long back story of abandonment etc).

Anyway, I told him my only bitch with him was that he promised to let us know he was safe-and he didn't. He agreed, he's plenty old enough now to at least drop a post card in the mail that says he's safe.
So, in the months since, he's been keeping touch and letting me know when he gets moved around etc. He's in Louisiana now.
But, today he's struggling because his mom is endlessly jumping boyfriend to boyfriend and not doing shit with her own life (or his). His stepfather still has legal custody (he lives here) and won't give it up, but his mom can't enroll him in school because of it.
The kid is smart-but educationally-fucked because of their stupid shit-it makes me SICK.
He's been on im with me for an hour and its SO FUCKING HARD to keep my mouth shut about HOW FUCKING RIDICULOUS it is the shit they are doing with him. He's 15 now. Still got 3 years to go.
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