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Old 08-27-2012, 07:58 PM
polypenguin polypenguin is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 133
Default perfect match, yet I have no attraction.

so here's the deal, the girlfriend and I have been working on being poly/open for a while now. We're not quite there yet, but we're on our way. No, that's not the dilema.

about a month ago we got a couple roommates who are amazing! We both love them very much. We could not have asked for better roomies. They are a couple, both of whom are quite attractive. We made an agreement before they moved in, roommates will be off limits.

now, this is the point where you're expecting me to say one of us is falling for one of them or visa versa..... No, believe it or not. The issue is this: the girl we'll call her K, and I are a perfect match, she even likes and dislikes every food I do (just as an example). We theoretically should be all over each other, but I find myself having no feelings for her other than purely platonic. Has anyone else experienced this? Because it is new to me. Obviously it's not bad, but it's well, perplexing.
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Old 08-27-2012, 08:14 PM
opalescent opalescent is offline
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: US
Posts: 2,172

Damn pheromones! I've met several folks who I like, have lots in common with, are attractive sorts and yet, nada. No sexual or romantic chemistry at all. It happens. Sometimes there is no rational reason.
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Old 08-27-2012, 08:40 PM
polypenguin polypenguin is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 133

yeah, I guess, haha. It's just something I have never delt with, and was wondering if anyone else had.
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Old 08-28-2012, 12:51 AM
AutumnalTone AutumnalTone is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Kansas City Metro
Posts: 2,187

Yeah, I've had that happen. I've also been in the position of extreme desire for a lady who apparently had no interest despite the strong match.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.

While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.
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Old 08-28-2012, 01:15 AM
Invi Invi is offline
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 78

Perhaps the lack of differences explains the lack of attraction? o.o
I dunno. Sounds like great friend material to me, though.
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