Originally Posted by AnnabelMore
I guess the question is, do you think you and he could embrace loving each other, without needing to change the relationship to be more primary...?
I think that's ultimately the question in this situation, and the challenge, as it's hard, at least for me, to visualize what that even looks like. Right now, to me, it means loving someone who spends a limited amount of time with me--although to be fair, I myself limited the time even more after our discussion--and knowing it will always be limited. I'm pretty sure I won't want to live like that forever.
His solution--again, spoken in agitation, I think--was that everything would be fine if I had another boyfriend from the poly world. To me, raising a bunch of kids and working two jobs and not having had any interest in dating to begin with, this is not even remotely a solution, for me to exert effort to 'find a boyfriend' I never wanted in the first place to make this work for the current BF.
I suppose so far, I've pretty much taken it a day at a time, and I don't know what the future holds. I see positive changes in my life and his both, as a result of this relationship, so I suppose I need to continue the one day at a time and seeing where this goes approaches.