Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Life stories and blogs

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #281  
Old 08-15-2012, 08:08 PM
CielDuMatin's Avatar
CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Upstate New York, USA
Posts: 1,456
Default

LR, I am sensing that you may be a little upset.

Am I correctly reading the signals that you are sending out, here and in the thread?

__________________
Please check out The Birdcage - an open, friendly Polyamory forum for all parts of New York State
http://www.thebirdcage.org/

"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb
Reply With Quote
  #282  
Old 08-17-2012, 02:45 AM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,290
Default

LOL! Ciel-however might you have gotten that impression?!?!?!?!?!

I can't help but laugh when you guys write this stuff!


Side note: Maca and I manage to FINALLY get on the phone and iron out the issue. In addition-we happened upon the detail that made connection/disconnection I was feeling make sense to him (THAT has taken a number of years). It popped out there and we were both like OMG! We just figured it out! HOLY FUCK!
I'm pretty sure he was as shocked as me. We've gone over the topic so many times over the last 14 years to no avail. Then-it just slipped out suddenly amidst our discussion of the argument (over miscommunication driven by insecurity and assumptions on his part) THERE was the clear picture for him AND the solution for us.
We did also manage to identify the miscommunication and the cause (assumption based in insecurity). Which helped clear up the issues of this week too.

WHEW! Now-back to the board... hmmmm..... I think I probably better behave. I mean-I haven't gotten "written up" in the 3? years I've been a poster... so it's not HUGE that I got one this week I think. But, still, probably not good to ignite riots too frequently and I think I probably ought to watch my mouth a couple more years.

GIGGLE
__________________
"Love As Thou Wilt"
Reply With Quote
  #283  
Old 08-17-2012, 02:46 AM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,290
Default

Oh-and for those who wonder about kids...

I was off to a "retreat" for home school kids the last two days. It was a blast. I took my youngest two kids and the two little girls I used to babysit who are also home schooled.

They got to go horseback riding, rock wall climbing, arts and crafts, geocaching, fossil hiking, campfire... and swimming (in a freezing lake!).

Very good for the soul being off the grid and enjoying nature.
__________________
"Love As Thou Wilt"
Reply With Quote
  #284  
Old 08-17-2012, 03:01 AM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Pennsyl-tucky
Posts: 1,130
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingRadiance View Post
LOL! In addition-we happened upon the detail that made connection/disconnection I was feeling make sense to him (THAT has taken a number of years). It popped out there and we were both like OMG! We just figured it out! HOLY FUCK!
I'm pretty sure he was as shocked as me. We've gone over the topic so many times over the last 14 years to no avail. Then-it just slipped out suddenly amidst our discussion of the argument ... THERE was the clear picture for him AND the solution for us.
FTW. Awesome!

MrS and I had an epiphany 3 or 4 years into our marriage (7-8 years into our relationship) where we realized that what I was really asking for (as opposed to what I said/thought I was asking for) was something that he was actually able to accommodate with enthusiasm. Sigh - so much better now. You think you are talking/arguing in circles and then...something "clicks" - someone hears the words you are saying with new insight and...ENLIGHTENMENT for all.

JaneQ
__________________
Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" Vee-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (21+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (3+ yrs) and MrS's best friend
Lotus: poly bi female, "it's complicated" relationships with Dude/JaneQ/MrS (1+ years)
TT: poly bi male, married to Lotus, FB with JaneQ
VV and MsJ: bi-women with male primaries, LTR LDR FWBs to JaneQ


My poly blogs here:
The Journey of JaneQSmythe
The Notebook of JaneQSmythe
Reply With Quote
  #285  
Old 08-17-2012, 03:11 AM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,290
Default

Yes Jane! It's amazing when that little click happens. I almost kissed the phone! (he's still out of town working).

Its so hard trying to figure some things out-but once ya do! WONDERFUL.



I told him-before the click happened-"I keep trying, I just haven't figured out the picture to draw for you yet". Then it happened and I laughed out loud.

I think more like galagirl writes and Maca-uh, yeah, not so much. hehehe. He's a straight, single line thinker-and fast too.
But I make him nuts with my circles.
__________________
"Love As Thou Wilt"
Reply With Quote
  #286  
Old 08-17-2012, 04:44 AM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 3,060
Default

Aw. I'm glad it clicked.

If it helps...

An anthropologist friend told me women need to speak 30K words a day to feel right. Men need 15K. I was amazed because suddenly so much made sense about me and the glassy-eyes of my honey when I push him past "I am now too full! Help!"

GalaGirl
Reply With Quote
  #287  
Old 08-17-2012, 11:09 PM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,290
Default

GG, that is a VERY interesting piece of trivia. I'll have to ponder that one over the weekend of camping!
Thank you for sharing!
__________________
"Love As Thou Wilt"
Reply With Quote
  #288  
Old 08-17-2012, 11:53 PM
SNeacail's Avatar
SNeacail SNeacail is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Near Disneyland
Posts: 1,575
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by GalaGirl View Post
An anthropologist friend told me women need to speak 30K words a day to feel right. Men need 15K. I was amazed because suddenly so much made sense about me and the glassy-eyes of my honey when I push him past "I am now too full! Help!"
I've heard this - so has my husband and he likes to remind me of it on occasion. Of course I might reply with, but you've only used 9k, so you should have a few more words left.
Reply With Quote
  #289  
Old 08-18-2012, 12:53 AM
Magdlyn's Avatar
Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 3,669
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by GalaGirl View Post

An anthropologist friend told me women need to speak 30K words a day to feel right. Men need 15K. I was amazed because suddenly so much made sense about me and the glassy-eyes of my honey when I push him past "I am now too full! Help!"
Heh, what about transpersons and gender-queers? My gf is trans and she just babbles on and on, and sometime I just can't take it anymore. I'm cisgendered female but genderqueer and I just have to get away sometimes. Spent 4 days at my own place this week and besides my part time job and a little IMing, I barely said a word... or heard one. Heaven. My own thoughts were enough to keep me "feeling right." I didn't want to tell anyone anything, I didn't want to hear any gossip or deeper conversation. Just peace and golden silence, ahhh...
__________________
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37
Reply With Quote
  #290  
Old 08-18-2012, 01:14 AM
DC7783 DC7783 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: We live in Arizona
Posts: 6
Default

Hello everyone
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
commitment, family oriented, love, lovingradiance, progress, v formation, vee dynamics

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 05:22 PM.