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  #11  
Old 08-16-2012, 05:15 PM
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Hiya. Been meaning to ask -- can you explain: what is an "agony aunt" and a "post-raph stunner?" I am unfamiliar with these terms and they have piqued my curiosity. Thanks!
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  #12  
Old 08-16-2012, 05:50 PM
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Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Hiya. Been meaning to ask -- can you explain: what is an "agony aunt" and a "post-raph stunner?" I am unfamiliar with these terms and they have piqued my curiosity. Thanks!
An agony aunt is a giver of advice, usually in column form. It's British slang. Picked it up when I was a teenager reading a British teen magazine. God, I miss Sugar.

A post-Raph stunner is a play on words. The women who posed for the Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood were known as "stunners". I'm a new breed of stunner. Different medium, similar looks, twenty-first century ideas.
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  #13  
Old 08-16-2012, 06:01 PM
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I'm glad you've started a blog on here.

If I were looking to date, I wouldn't have the foggiest idea where to start. Runic Wolf thinks that these things come easily for me but I don't know the first thing about dating women; something I told Wendigo's wife when we were trying to have a relationship with her. Neither of us knew what we were doing and I learned from it, applied a bit of what I'd learned to Loveleigh for the couple of months that Runic Wolf was dating her, but she was his girlfriend and I didn't want to presume too much.
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  #14  
Old 08-16-2012, 06:27 PM
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I've got no clue how to go about it. When I was a junior in high school, I had a long-distance girlfriend, but we met through fandom and all we did was text and write. (Texting in the shelves at work? Naughty. Texting your girlfriend when you work for a conservative? Wicked!) Okay, and chat. Point is, we never met, and I only saw one picture of her.

I wish we'd met after high school, because she lived in Syracuse. What a doddle compared to all the other online friendships I've had! But I drove her away because I was so fucked-up that year and I don't think she'd have tolerated the poly, anyhow. She ended up going to NYU and being some kind of fantastic while I burned out.

I miss the idea of her more than I miss her because I didn't know her that well, after all. It's been nearly ten years now. I can only remember her face, her first name, and her screen name. I could try again with a woman, I guess. At least now I'd have the brain chemistry under control and the whole poly-mono-girls-boys thing settled. (Poly. Both/all/any.) But I wouldn't be a kid anymore, dating like kids do. How do women date, as opposed to girls?
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  #15  
Old 08-16-2012, 07:08 PM
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I'm not sure that it's too different. My experience is really limited, but other than the two women I dated being married mothers (like myself), dating wasn't too different from when I was a kid only the food was better and the movies were not kid friendly.
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  #16  
Old 08-17-2012, 04:36 AM
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A smile for a Thursday morning. Thank you!
So welcome. I always get a smile at your blog.

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I had a therapist try to convince me I'd been raped by a friend's dad because I have these vivid dreams about the act. It's possible, but we live in rape culture. A woman is always on her guard, always afraid. Always at risk. So is it any wonder I'd dream?
I had one dream about my dad. It was so odd I've never forgotten. He was just about the only person that didn't molest me as a kid. No saint, him; but he went too far out of his way to ensure that was not a hurt I'd get from him. I saw an interesting videoblog the other day, of a woman ranting about rape culture. She was stunningly articulate.

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Awww, you sweetheart! I don't know that I could've got used to sharing my family after so long.
Oh no, i didn't exactly volunteer. I was Cinderella though, so it was just one more thing put-upon me. I have still not adjusted to sharing him, and it's almost 40 years later.... Pathetic.

Stupid staff robot.
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  #17  
Old 08-18-2012, 06:47 PM
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Default Just can't leave well enough alone.

Today's gem from OKCupid is a five-word message reproduced verbatim below:

hello how are you today?

Oh, you poor sucker, whoever you are. You poor, ugly, practically illiterate sucker in search of an available uterus for the continuation of your line. You know nothing about me.

Punctuating my sentences correctly. And you?

There's a devil riding my shoulder today.
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  #18  
Old 08-18-2012, 10:18 PM
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Punctuating my sentences correctly. And you?
YOUCH! Love it!
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  #19  
Old 08-19-2012, 02:55 AM
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I did come to feel bad for him. A raft of teachers and professors did him a disservice by permitting him to obtain any kind of diploma (if indeed he ever did). So I wrote, in reply to his second short missive:

Do you want me to proofread your entire profile, or just your messages?

Properly, it's "Hello. How are you today?" and "Yes, I think so. What did I do wrong?" The first was a classic run-on sentence, easily separated by a period and appropriate capitalization*. The second could also become "Yes, I think so; what did I do wrong?" because the two sentences are so closely related. I do love semi-colons; alas, I fear I overuse them. (You see?)

Permit me to recommend Lynne Truss on the matter.

As for the matter at hand: I am not sure why you contacted me in the first place, given that I am not a Bible-believing sort of person and disagree heartily with the Pope on the subject of a woman's obligation to breed until her uterus drops from her pelvis. I am pointedly opposed to bearing children of my own, for reasons I consider entirely valid. You would do well to ask a different woman how she is doing, because nothing will come of an association with me.

Anachronistically as ever
C.L.

* Or capitalisation; either is correct.


I'm a terrible snob regarding the English language. I'm terrible period with German, and I'm certain my French would give an actual Francophone fits; this is why I don't go a-courting in either of those languages! I keep it to English, and prefer a level of proficiency approaching mine in my partners.

...sometimes, yes, I sound like I've stepped out of a Victorian novel.
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  #20  
Old 08-19-2012, 04:24 AM
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Default My Fair Unwedding

I couldn't do a "real" wedding, O Best Beloved. My prospective whoever would have to be able to do without the fuss and feathers. I can list... hang on, counting on fingers, actually listing names... no more than thirty. On my side, anyhow. Six are family-family, the women I want standing up with me are sisters-by-other-misters (and they'll be catching me if I decide to have a panic attack), and I'll have to hire a doctor/NP/PA for the day (since three of us counting self are just that creaky).

The fact of the polyamory would have to be kept on the DL, but a wedding to another person would likely be about the people in that particular tier of the relationship celebrating their bond. GalaGirl, you're catching.

I don't know that I could find the traditional wedding gown that would flatter me. I'd want to incorporate color. I am writing my ideal outfit into the novels-in-progress -- sheer muslin tunic with bloused/cuffed sleeves over a lavender jersey gown, all belted under the bust, both sets of sleeves hitting at the elbow. Lavender silk slippers or white kid. (Sorry to all you vegans out there.) Hair down, veil extending from a "tiara" of lavender flowers lashed to a bit of some whitish metal. A certain three-ring necklace, so I might carry my darling and his darling with me the whole day.

Not sure what I'd have in my hands. I don't feel a traditional bouquet would do -- maybe a white rose surrounded by lavender sprigs and, to represent my other other spouse, a quill? (Because I married my writing years ago.)

It's good that I can't imagine what we would vow. I have no idea who zie would be. How can I say what would come to matter to us?

Rum cocktails only for booze option; we toast with non-alcoholic option or nothing at all. Breakfast-at-insert-non-breakfast-time here for food, vegan, omnivore, and gluten-free items available. BIG LABELS ON THOSE. Do not fancy guests collapsing in the middle of the dancing.

I've saved the music for last because music really is the food of love (play on!). Everyone I know has got great taste. I want my friend B's band to alternate with my DJ-inna-laptop, which is pretty much a playlist hooked up to great grand speakers. Requests taken prior to the day; if you're not sure I have it, give me a mix CD.

It's only a dream on paper, only because I'm watching David Tutera. I'm okay without it. I might like someday to have a party like this to celebrate the love between the lot of us and to hell with actually marrying! But formal, please, formal and fancy and gorgeous while we party.
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