Hey, nycindie, that's a great point - it most definitely wouldn't be a good precedent to give in to him when he was the one to break the rules.
Thanks for the food for thought. I have never had to deal with a similar situation - and of course I can only base my advice on my own personal experience. I am afraid I failed at expressing that clearly. I believe in communication - it's absolutely fundametal for a good relationship.
I also believe in challenging my own boundaries whenever it feels like I am just giving in to my own childish ego. Does it make any sense? Now, I am not saying your feelings were childish, Prudence, or irrelevant. I just suggested taking some time to look at them with some distance. If they still appear as serious and relevant as before, then it's time to do something about them. I don't know about you, but my feelings are not the most reliable of things.
But, again, nycindie was right about the precedent thing. As far as rules go, you was right. I guess one could argue that your partner didn't break the rules, but actually asked you for a favour..... but no, no, I am not going to defend it, he could have planned his day better.