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  #31  
Old 12-01-2009, 06:49 PM
Fidelia Fidelia is offline
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Mono, I'm still sending good vibes your way. In copious quanitities. I hope your getting them.

Love you, BrotherMan.
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  #32  
Old 12-01-2009, 07:56 PM
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Just another member wishing you well, mono.
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  #33  
Old 12-02-2009, 02:01 AM
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Take this as you will my friend,

Normalcy is whatever you define it to be in your head, and nobody can take it away from you. Comfort is found not in a place that makes you feel safe but in a place that keeps you sane and makes you angry and sad and wondering "What the fuck?". Comfort is a little kid shaking a snowglobe and all the little artificial snowflakes are emotions. They flutter around and look beautiful, a place that makes you feel 'safe' simply eases your troubles and takes away your cares.

However cares are what keep you alive. You think a soldier fighting for the people he/she loves and for people who dont share the freedom his/her loved ones share, feels safe in combat? No but he/she feels comfort knowing that what he/she is doing is going to help someone. To others, the battlefeild might not seem "normal" but to him/her it is normal. Its just another day in the office.

Theres alot of things you can question until your eyes pop out of your skull but that doesnt mean youll find all the answers you want. Be happy with what you have, you have a womam that sees you as her world, you have people who care about you. Your a lucky man..

Thats just my personal opinion. Not a flame, or an order. Not pushing anything. Just stating what I think.
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  #34  
Old 12-02-2009, 02:42 AM
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Mono,

Keep the wind in your face and ride till you feel right with it all.Sending our love from AK. You need anything or just want to chat RP has my Facebook.
You still owe me a place to ride my bike in the winter



Peace and Love
Maca
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  #35  
Old 12-02-2009, 02:57 AM
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hey berserker, that was very well thought out and very poignant. thank you. It meant a lot to me that you say this at this time and on this part of our journey. Very perceptive and I thank you for taking the time to tell us what you think... I appreciate hearing your voice.
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  #36  
Old 12-02-2009, 03:09 AM
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berserker239 berserker239 is offline
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Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
hey berserker, that was very well thought out and very poignant. thank you. It meant a lot to me that you say this at this time and on this part of our journey. Very perceptive and I thank you for taking the time to tell us what you think... I appreciate hearing your voice.
Well im always here when you or mono need me. Or anyone for that matter..
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  #37  
Old 12-02-2009, 03:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by berserker239 View Post

Thats just my personal opinion. Not a flame, or an order. Not pushing anything. Just stating what I think.
Wow Berserker! Great to hear from you. Did you join the army recently? Thanks for the advice. Don't worry about giving me orders...20 years in the military has conditioned me to take them :0 Take care and if you did in fact sign up...stay safe!
Remember..the greatest motivation in battle is not fighting what you are going to lose..it's fighting for what the people who love you will lose.

Mono
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  #38  
Old 12-02-2009, 03:32 PM
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Mono,

Keep the wind in your face and ride till you feel right with it all.Sending our love from AK. You need anything or just want to chat RP has my Facebook.
You still owe me a place to ride my bike in the winter



Peace and Love
Maca
Get down here, Brother! The sun is out and the roads are dry...the air is crisp and freeing. That is a ride I look forward to no matter what time a year my friend

Take care
Peace and Love right back at you
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  #39  
Old 12-06-2009, 02:59 AM
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berserker239 berserker239 is offline
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Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG View Post
Wow Berserker! Great to hear from you. Did you join the army recently? Thanks for the advice. Don't worry about giving me orders...20 years in the military has conditioned me to take them :0 Take care and if you did in fact sign up...stay safe!
Remember..the greatest motivation in battle is not fighting what you are going to lose..it's fighting for what the people who love you will lose.

Mono
Thats the whole reason im joining. My recruiter missed our appointment and never called back so idk what im gonna do. Maybe just go down there. I hope your doing better, my friend.
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  #40  
Old 01-07-2012, 02:20 AM
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Morningglory629 Morningglory629 is offline
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I have been struggling a lot lately in regards to missing "normalcy" in how it used to be defined for me. Although I was never fully connected to the people in my old social community it was comfortable, stable, and understood. It was also what most of the people around me were doing and I'm totally ok with not questioning or going against the flow.


I have felt some resentment in being pulled into another community through my relationship with Redpepper.

Poly, sex positive, kink, BDSM, even activism, socialism, vegetarianism, and passionate environmentalism are all different to me in a community sense and yet they are a part of my life now. I am learning and finding enjoyment in some of these new areas but the sheer pressure of this feels like a tidal wave sometimes.


Love is not enough for me to be healthy. I have to be comfortable with the new social direction my life has taken. I don't see how I can separate myself from the community the woman I love embraces and wants; if it remains unknown than it remains a threat. I've played that out in my head and it would be "the beginning of the end" for me. It would be like living a separate life or having a casual relationship that is not acceptable for me. I am either romantically in or out. I can be friend or full blown Love, but nothing in between; there are no half measures with Redpepper.

So I struggle. I'm forcing myself to let go of an old community that I never really belonged to. I'm pushing myself to embrace the community the woman I love enjoys and am making headway for sure. I have a long way to go in coming to terms with this area of inner conflict but I get so much support from Redpepper and her husband.

The love I have for Redpepper is immense and has made me work harder than in any other relationship because the issues span a broad spectrum. Dealing with the mono-poly thing is just the tip of the iceberg in our relationship. We have taken a dive off a cliff and the waters are a lot deeper than they look….I just need to avoid drowning.

Peace and Love
Mono
Just wow. Articulate the struggle is more than what you did. I feel it man, and I am the poly one. Not sure how you are feeling now since I haven't been on here regularly but you nailed the overarching problem we all face in the mono-poly "border state." Even as a poly, I struggle with the anti-traditional or counter-to-everything-I-ever-knew way of living. Thanks Mon. As always I appreciate you.
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