Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Dating & Friendships > North America

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 06-19-2012, 03:29 AM
OKCCouple OKCCouple is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: OKC, OK
Posts: 11
Smile OKC Couple Looking for a LTR with a Bi Female

Hello all, brand new to this forum.

Couple from OKC, 33 years old.
He is Matthew, Straight.
She is Heather, Bi.

We have been around the "swinger" community for a few years now, but never really happy with it. We get looked down on by vanilla friends that know for being "swingers." We get looked down on by swingers for wanting lasting relationships and refusing to be bed hoppers. We have had one long term relationship with another couple that ended about a year ago. We have been cautious about it since then, as we want to find the right person, and not just jump back into anything for the sake of being in it. At this point we miss parts of that relationship and are interested in exploring it again.

To describe ourselves:

Him: I consider myself funny and easygoing. I am very eclectic in most categories. I like a wide range of activities. I enjoy writing, photography, and reading. I enjoy playing video games, going bowling, mini-golfing, go-karting, poker, board games, hiking, going to concerts, going to sporting events, and just about anything else as long as it is with good company.
I enjoy most types of music, TV shows, movies, etc. I love comedies the most. I don't enjoy depressing movies. If you tell me You have to see this movie, it had me bawling like a baby... I probably will never bother to see it.

Her: I love both going out and staying in. I enjoy a date night out, hitting a club, having some drinks and relaxing, but I also enjoy cuddling up on my couch and reading. I enjoy watching movies and tv shows, and prefer crime dramas, dramas, comedies, and romances, or a combination of those. I am usually up to at least trying new things. I love to listen to music, but don't have a lot of time to. I enjoy doing crafts. I especially enjoy things that can be done socially.

To describe each other:
Him describing her: She is sweet and wonderful. She can be really shy, but can sometimes surprise me, and occasionally embarrass me. She will often be a wallflower until you get her going, but she will typically respond well to playful, nice people.

Her describing him: He is funny and outgoing. Very quick and witty. He loves to flirt and loves women that will escalate his flirts. He is the kind of guy that makes friend in the check-out line at the grocery store, the gas pump, the barber, in an elevator, on a plane, or waiting for the light to change while at a crosswalk. And I don't just mean he will strike up a conversation with them... I mean they just seem to fall in love with him. One conversation and they are inviting us to their kid's birthday party or to meet their family. I don't understand it, but I guess he just makes people really comfortable.

Describing our interests:
Right now we are mainly looking for a playful female. We can't say a couple COULDN'T interest us, but right now we are mainly looking for that mythical unicorn.

It would be great to find a woman that we can be friends with. Both of us. Someone who could go shopping with her, or go out to lunch with him. Someone who we could take to the comedy club, and have a few drinks and a few laughs, but also someone who would be happy cuddling us on the couch and watching a movie. It would be awesome if she could be serious when needed, but goofy, giggly, flirty, and playful the rest of the time. We would like a woman who would interrupt a movie in order to drag one (or both) of us back to the bedroom because she wants to play, but also enjoy cuddling up and falling asleep together. It would be nice if she could drop by for quickies, or if she could hang out all night. In the bedroom, we would love her to be eager, and needy, and for us all to work together to fulfill those needs. Someone that we would be comfortable having over around other "vanilla" friends (or co-workers), and she would still have a good time. A happy woman with a great smile that she shows off frequently is one of our biggest turn-ons. A woman that is always in a bad mood and mad at the world and everyone she knows all the time is one of our biggest turn offs.

And there you have it, End of Prologue... lol
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 06-19-2012, 01:04 PM
CielDuMatin's Avatar
CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Upstate New York, USA
Posts: 1,456
Default

Just wanted to comment on your post - since I'm not a Unicorn I'm not someone you would be interested in.

Your post stands out from a lot of the rest of them for various reasons, and I think that this will increase your chances of being successful on your search. You recognise that what you are searching for is a long-shot, and have said that you are willing to consider other options. You have described yourselves, too - which tells a person who they would be getting involved with. It never ceases to boggle my mind how many leave that stuff out, making them look totally anonymous (and slightly creepy, in my book). Someone once told me that they weren't going to reveal that because then it would cause the female to need to ask. Well, guess what? They won't bother.

So I really wish you luck, and wish that others would follow your lead on how to write a more compelling personals post...
__________________
Please check out The Birdcage - an open, friendly Polyamory forum for all parts of New York State
http://www.thebirdcage.org/

"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 06-19-2012, 06:23 PM
OKCCouple OKCCouple is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: OKC, OK
Posts: 11
Default

Thank you very much!

And yes, we know it is a longshot, but it is a longer shot if we don't try to get what we want.

Also, we are always looking for friends, so please don't let your status bar you from hitting us up.

Lastly, I agree with you entirely... I am a little worried by the number"looking for" posts with no information... And more worried by the number of positive responses they get. We are interested in the dating aspect... The getting to know one another, the going out and having fun, the caring about someone and thinking about them randomly while at work.

We don't expect anyone to volunteer for that without getting to know us, and vice versa.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 06-19-2012, 06:26 PM
OKCCouple OKCCouple is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: OKC, OK
Posts: 11
Default

Also, let me now that our description is the perfect ideal scenario... Not a strict requirement.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 06-19-2012, 06:48 PM
CielDuMatin's Avatar
CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Upstate New York, USA
Posts: 1,456
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by OKCCouple View Post
I am a little worried by the number"looking for" posts with no information... And more worried by the number of positive responses they get.
Cause and effect.

Don't be worried - the fact that you didn't do that drastically increases your chances, in my opinion. I'd be worried if I were looking and EVERYONE did it - then you'd have to find some other way of standing out from the crowd.
__________________
Please check out The Birdcage - an open, friendly Polyamory forum for all parts of New York State
http://www.thebirdcage.org/

"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 06-19-2012, 11:55 PM
OKCCouple OKCCouple is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: OKC, OK
Posts: 11
Default

thank you.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 06-22-2012, 01:43 AM
SLJ SLJ is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Colorado
Posts: 12
Default Agree you stand out

I agree that your post seems to stand out amoung everyones. Good luck finding what you're seeking.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 06-22-2012, 05:34 PM
mrspolyamorous's Avatar
mrspolyamorous mrspolyamorous is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 11
Default

I would consider being someone's unicorn as long as the people are ok with me being married. Feel free to contact me further if you'd like. I'm in Oklahoma as well. I'd like to talk further and share some things about us/myself.

Friend me and you can see my private gallery of us both. And you both sound quite interesting and intriguing. Very similar to what we are looking for ideally.
__________________
Me: 32, bi, female, married 14 years to R.
R: 33, hetero male who is polyfriendly, NSA friendly under the right circumstances.
S: The child R and I have together.
Neither have found the partner(s) we would like to merge villages with. In the meantime we are exploring our collective sexuality to find a frequency that feels right.

Last edited by mrspolyamorous; 06-22-2012 at 05:40 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 06-22-2012, 05:52 PM
OKCCouple OKCCouple is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: OKC, OK
Posts: 11
Default

Thank you both very much.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 06-23-2012, 12:43 AM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,130
Default

Where do you live?

Or are you hoping that she will be willing to relocate? Or are you yourselves willing to relocate for her?

Are those your real names? I would rethink that one, for privacy sake... But that's just me.
__________________
Gralson: my husband (works out of town).
Auto: my girlfriend (lives with her husband Zoffee).

The most dangerous phrase in the English language is "we've always done it this way."
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 06:36 PM.