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Old 06-15-2012, 07:27 AM
msthreescompany msthreescompany is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: New York, NY
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Default New to the forum - Triad newbie, any advice?

Hello all, Very new to the forum. Thought I would connect with other polyamorous folks in hopes to gain some incite on other experiences. Some successes and some not so successful endeavors. I am also learning the lingo..so I suppose I would be considered a triad.

Have been in a relationship with a woman for going on 2 years now. We are both equally attracted to a young gentlemen, who happens to be drawn to our energy as well and the three of us have recently started discussing a relationship, how that would work and so on and so forth. It is so exciting, but then again all relationships are exciting in the beginning.

Trying to determine how we would operate if we all decide to live together or if its best for my lady and I to remain a couple and to "date" the gentlemen for now, before rushing into anything. Open to any dialogue, advice or anything anyone can offer.

Thanks :-)
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Old 06-15-2012, 01:38 PM
AnnabelMore's Avatar
AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,285


I would definitely suggest waiting and dating, even for as long as a year. Triad dynamics can be very tricky and prone to changing and evolving. Best not to put anyone's living situation on the line while you all are feeling that out.

This is an excellent set of advice, for your gentleman friend and for you and your partner: http://www.morethantwo.com/coupledating.html

I think the most important question to ask right now, while you're still in the giddy phase, is would it be ok if he ended up developing a relationship with one of you but ended up just being friends with the other? I and others wrote at great length on this question and related thoughts here: http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=23779

Best of luck!!
Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.
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