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Old 05-10-2012, 11:48 PM
mostlyclueless mostlyclueless is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2012
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Default Thoughts on choosing a therapist?

I have posted a couple times before, but the short version is that I am having a lot of garden variety but very intense jealousy problems dealing with my poly relationship. I have been looking for a therapist to help me work things out.

The two I have seen have seemed to generally not be open to the idea of polyamory. I may be misinterpreting, and neither said anything explicitly condemning it, but from the questions they ask me and the comments they make, it seems clear that they think the solution to my jealousy problems is to give up this wacky idea and just be monogamous.

After months of pain and soul-searching and talking to people like you all, I really think that if that was the answer I would gladly just do it. But I don't; I think the best course of action for me is to talk through and find ways to manage my jealousy problems.

If I try to find a third therapist, I worry that I am just looking for someone to placate me, and it may not be what I need. Should I keep working with the woman I saw today, and maybe tell her these kinds of thoughts? Or should I just try to be open to the possibility that maybe both of the therapists are right, and I am torturing myself trying to fit a square peg in a round hole? Have you all had any good/bad therapy experiences that might help?
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